Every time I’ve moved, started a new job, implemented a new wellness strategy, or ended a relationship, it was because I was ready for more. I’d learned what I needed for my soul growth, and it was time for the next lesson. Life had a bigger vision for me. Quite simply, I was ready to uplevel.
If your current situation feels stale or no longer fulfilling, it may be a sign that life has a bigger vision for you too.
But that doesn’t mean it won’t be hard. Sometimes, no matter how glorious or how necessary the uplevel is, we hesitate. The question is how to change?
Making friends with uncertainty.
Maybe you’ve been feeling itchy for a while. Perhaps you’ve fantasized about new opportunities but wanted more certainty before risking it. I mean, what if you change your current habits or situation and life actually gets worse? How do you know you won’t be making a huge mistake?
Well, my friends, sometimes it does get worse before it gets so much better. For example, when you improve your diet, there’s a really good chance you’ll have some detox symptoms. They’ll suck, ‘tis true. But once you’re on the other side of them, you’ll be shocked at how amazing you feel.
And get this—no matter what happens, every action we take teaches us more about ourselves. That is the essence of the awakened path and it’s how we become more of who we truly are. Even a step backward can catapult us forward, as long as we’re conscious and intentional about it.
Growing pains are inevitable, mistakes are necessary, and certainty, no matter how much planning we do, is impossible. And that’s what makes life so creative, educational and very much alive.
Cue some trusty Oprah wisdom: “There is no such thing as failure. Failure is just life trying to move us in another direction.” Cheers!
Know when it’s time to change.
So how do we decide if it’s time to try something new? Necessary life shifts often come with aches, pains and trackable symptoms. For example, what used to feel good or help you unwind now feels like a bad habit. What inspired or challenged you now feels tiresome.
Behaviors that got you by are no longer working. Your head says, “stay put” but your heart says, “move on.” And I can really relate to this one, your curiosity and browsing history have taken a new, alluring direction.
If this sounds like you, then whether you’re aware of it or not, you’re already starting to change. Yup, it’s happening. The train is leaving the station and in subtle ways your consciousness is pushing you to grow.
The trick is to accept that change before staying the same becomes unbearable.
Change before the relationship becomes toxic, before your eating habits ruin your health, before you get fired from your terrible job. Don’t wait until you’re up against the ropes. Resist change too long and you’ll find that your options are limited.
Instead, we want to tap into our intuition sooner. As soon as you notice that discomfort or dissatisfaction, pop open your inner compass. Get honest with yourself: “I’m not feeling this anymore. I think I’m being invited to uplevel. And I’m willing to take a leap.”
Have a strategy.
Change is scary, no matter what it is. One way that you can take back some control and give yourself a little bit of solid ground to stand on, is to have a change strategy.
Certainty is not possible, but there are things we can do to alleviate the worst of our fears. Knowing yourself is the most important thing here. Everyone reacts to change differently. Some embrace change, while others, like me, just want to crawl in a hole, eat cookies, and pretend it’s not happening.
Armed with self-knowledge, you can develop the strategies that work for you. But, here are a few examples of what you can do to help yourself during a time of change:
Change can bring with it a lot of noise and distraction. Take time for yourself, to meditate or walk in the woods or just sit and think. Tune into your inner voice so your intuition can lead you.
Know your strengths.
Self-doubt is crippling, I know. So I like to journal lists of my strengths, experiences, contacts—all the things that tell me I’m ready for this change. Then, when negative thoughts creep in, I tell them how prepared I really am.
Sometimes when you’re stretching and growing it helps to reach out to those who have walked your path. Find someone who has started a new business or moved across the country—whatever it is you feel life is calling you to do. Give them a call or invite them to coffee. Pick their brain and enlist their support.
That’s the whole reason I started my Thrive Mastermind and Thrive Bootcamp. Running your own wellness business can feel overwhelming. It’s way more fun to be on this journey with great friends beside you and experts to guide you. Whatever mountain you’re feeling called to climb, find a community to join. Look for one that creates a safe space for sharing successes, brainstorming ideas, and conquering challenges.
You don’t have to go it alone.
Be ready to let go.
When you start shifting, other people will start noticing. They may even want the old you back, because when we change it often shines a light on other people’s blocks or limitations.
Chances are your friends and family don’t always like that, and they might not understand why things can’t be the same. Things can’t be the same because you’re not the same. Know that sometimes you have to let go of something and sometimes, someone, before you can let something new in.
While you were sleeping or dreaming or scrolling through your social media accounts, you started to have a vision for a new way of living. Once that seed was planted in your psyche there was no turning back. It was just a matter of time before your head came into alignment with your heart—and that’s a good thing!—no matter what discomfort it creates.
If this sounds familiar, it could be time for you to spread your wings.
This doesn’t automatically mean that what you have isn’t good enough or that you need to totally renovate your life. It just means that you have more potential than you’re currently using and it’s time to step it up and do the work.
Apply for the job, join the gym, do the cleanse, get your butt into therapy, try online dating and so on!
You know what you need to do, I’m just here to gently nudge you.
Will it be scary? Fuck, yeah! Fear will always show up in these moments. Part of fear’s job is to keep you safe. But fear doesn’t understand that in certain situations it may not be keeping you safe at all, what it’s really doing is keeping you stuck.
I remember when I left my acting career, sold my home and moved to the woods. People thought I was crazy, and I agreed with them.
At my house closing, I was terrified. I didn’t know anyone. I had no idea how to make a living (other than live off of the profit from downsizing). And I didn’t know how to be a homeowner (I’m not a handy girl).
But guess what I did know? That shaky-ass, freaky place was exactly where I needed to be. No maps, no manuals, just me finding my way and finding myself. That leap changed everything, and every leap that came after that was informed by it.
There’s no doubt that more scary leaps are ahead. I won’t always like them, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. As long as my intention is crystal clear and I stay true to myself, everything will work out for my highest possible good. And the same holds true for you, dear one.
Your rising requires a willingness to tip your hat to fear and do it anyway.
Each time we transform our fear into courage we get closer to our true power—our soul. And the more we bridge the gap between our human needs and our soul needs, the more we evolve.
The Universe will always catch you and place you exactly where you need to be to shine.
Your turn: What strategies have helped you navigate change in your life?
Peace and upleveling,