Kris Carr

Blog Post

A Love Note… to Your Younger Self

Hi Sweet Friends,

A while ago, I posted the picture above on Facebook with this caption:

“Fill in the rest of this sentence: If I could give my younger self some nurturing advice, I would tell her (or him)…”

The response from my Facebook family was so beautiful that I wanted to share it with you. Heartfelt notes of self-love, self-encouragement and self-compassion poured into the comments section. I think we raised the energy on the worldwide web that day! Here are a few of your lovely notes:

Kim wrote: Your red hair makes you special in the best way. Wear that with super goddess strength. The teasing and the name calling is just teaching you how to be STRONG!! Also LOVE your body its the only one you have got and its freaking AMAZING!!! Your legs your skin your eyes all of it. Treasure it and treat it like a goddess.

Eileen wrote: To keep dreaming big, hold your head high and don’t get caught up with the expectations and limitations of those around you. It’s OK to look in the mirror and like yourself, it’s OK to smile a lot, it’s OK to be happy and let the little things make you smile.

Beril wrote: Do not be scared so much and do not waste your time by thinking about what others have said, done to you, do not try to comfort them, do not try to please them, do not be scared of the changes life brings, everything works and life goes on somehow, be faithful, let go, do not try to save the world, do the best for yourself, listen to yourself and take care of yourself, love yourself, forgive yourself, enjoy every moment, if something difficult is going on then hug yourself first and be your genuine presence to yourself first, when it comes to others give, love, forgive and show compassion without any expectation, free yourself from good or bad opinion of others …

Lucy wrote: Life will get better, little one. Your mom and sister really do love you. You are precious, worthy of love and deserve to feel safe. The bullies are suffering from their own problems and it’s not about you. Your soulmate will be in freshman English with you so stay in school or you won’t get another chance until 13 years later. Take solace in your school work and you will have opportunities for a better life.

Here’s what I would say: Dark nights are inevitable, don’t fight them, surrender sweet darling. You’ll figure it out. You’ll grow from this. You’ll grow and shine brighter than you can possibly imagine.

I invite you to take 5 minutes to do this simple exercise.

All you need is a pen and paper, or your computer. I want you to think about the mini-you. The kid that still lives in you but might not get the same care and attention anymore.

Write a note to that awesome kid.

What would you tell him or her? Does she need some kind words to help her get through a tough time? Maybe he’s hanging onto self-doubt or shame and could use your unconditional love to finally release what’s holding him back. Or perhaps she’s got a big dream and needs your encouragement to take a leap of faith. Whatever it is, show your support for your inner whippersnapper.

No one has to see this note, so don’t edit your words. And in case you need a little help finding the words, I created this collage of even more comments from the Facebook post I mentioned earlier. Read it out loud. Print it and post it on your fridge, above your desk, or next to your bathroom mirror. Pass it along to someone who needs it.

This practice is a love note from your true self. The more you do it (and listen to your own advice) the easier it will be to embrace who you are right now.



Your turn: If you feel drawn to share your advice to your younger self, post it in the comments below. I can’t wait to read your love notes!

Peace & self-compassion,

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  1. Matt Jäger says:

    Matt nobody knows the rules to this crazy game. Follow your heart, dream big, and don’t be so concerned abou what others think of you. Make it your own. This life is such a beautiful gift so get out there and live it, experience it, make mistakes, brush yourself off, and continue to love to a degree you never thought possible. It is about the journey and your companions so laugh often, make fun of everything, and treasure those dear friends that make everything better.

  2. I know it sounds silly and vain but I’d tell myself QUIT worrying about your skin, no one gives a shit about your breakouts!

  3. Deborah says:

    Have faith in yourself. Study hard! No one can take what you have learned away from you!

  4. Kristin says:

    Being shy and too tall, and looking odd with all those braces on your teeth just means you’re going to be faboulous, strong and creative. Don’t wait so long until you realize that, look for your goals earlier.

  5. Believe in yourself. No matter what anyone says. You are loved, and you are not only worthwhile, you are integral to this world and to this life. Believe. Trust yourself. Your intuition is correct – trust it above the opinions of those around you. Believe in yourself, because you are a powerful being who can manifest any reality she desires. Believe in yourself, in your worth, in your dreams. Believe and they will be yours.

  6. danielle says:

    I love you!!! I truly love-adore-and support you unconditionally sweet baby!! Life is going to get pretty dark and this is part of your amazing journey!! You will break over to the other side and everything will make sense. I love you i love you i unconditionally love YOU xx

  7. Manny says:

    Dear kid, loads of love to you!!!!! You are loved and deserve best of the things in this world!! Just don’t give up! DON’T QUIT. Life has ups and downs. But God loves you and He will keep you going.. just hold HIS HAND and things will eventually get better.. don’t punish yourself for mistakes others did. HE SEES ALL!!! Lastly don’t take yourself granted because you’re the best of all angles 🙂

  8. Bryan says:

    You’re loved, hugged, and kissed in every moment even when you’re not so smile! The relationships you have and share with people are like water drink it all in. Breathe in the day like you would a flower, slowly.
    Fear grows more fear and constricts to a narrow view. Love grows more of everything that radiates from your heart and expands in all directions. Oh, don’t forget to floss. I Love You!

    • Lei says:

      Too cute! I lol with the flossing part. I wouldn’t have thought to put that in my own message but it’s so true 😉

    • Bryan says:

      The place between the mind and heart will lie answers you seek (go within). We are all an island until you drain the water and see we are all connected. Stay true to yourself. Know and live your passion/purpose.

  9. Judith says:

    I LOVE YOU, and you are so loved! You are beautiful and always and already good enough, precious and great. Love yourself now, be happy now, instead of waiting for your own or someone else’s permission, or for that thing that has to happen first… do it now! Be grateful, be light and love and joy and peace, and please… forgive. Yourself and others, too. Enjoy the small things, see blessings everywhere (because they are) and remember: you are blessed, and you are a blessing! Laugh often, take walks more often and twirl around, be silly and just breathe. Dream big, and then take small steps to make your dreams a reality. Take good care of yourself! Live well, love well, eat well and think well. Don’t believe everything you think. Be your own cheerleader. Shine your light, honey, you have so much to give and to contribute. You are worthy, and just being your glorious self is amazingly awesome and good enough! You go girl, whoohoo! I love you! Xxxx

    I could go on… 🙂

    • Judith says:

      Like please, speak to a safe and trusted person about what’s happening in your life, it will help, and it will save you so much pain and hurt later on! Sharing your troubles is good. Period. So share! No matter what the doctors say, trust your gut (and heal it, it needs that), you are NOT crazy and you can be healed. For every negative thought you think about yourself or something or someone else, think five positive ones. Focus on what you want and like, and keep doing it! Every time you get up from a couch, bed, or chair, find something to be grateful for – in down times yay, plumming! is always useful – your life will change. Keep living, you will get through the bad stuff, and please… you can always ask for help. Make friends. Life is better with friends. They can be the family you crave for.

      • Kate says:

        Yes Judith, no matter what the doctors say, trust your gut. You can be healed. I lived through a devastatingly painful and incapacitating auto immune disease that I was told had no cure 17 years ago. I was in so much pain that I couldn’t work, drive or sleep. Until I decided one day that I was done. I did what the doctors said couldn’t be done. I no longer am sick. I no longer live in pain. I am healthy again and I have my life back. I wish the same for you Judith.

        • Judith says:

          Thanks Kate, that’s really sweet! I’m so happy you got your life back, and it inspires me to keep going, turtle-style. Here’s to healing and miracles!

  10. Lisa says:

    Don’t be so afraid to try things or to speak up.
    Mom and Dad are doing the best they know how.

  11. Cynthia says:

    When you are faced with a challenge,
    look fear in the face and DIVE IN!!!!!!!!!!!

  12. Dee Romesburg says:

    Don’t listen to them. They’re wrong. You are beautiful and smart and your life will be so much better than you can imagine. You will be loved. You will have lifelong friends. You will be happy.

  13. Melissa says:

    * Is it possible to have you make this collage into a pdf file for download? I LOVE it and would love to be able to print it off in its entirety. 🙂

  14. Cassie says:

    This is beautiful, kris! Thank you. I would tell myself – you’re doing great, beautiful. Don’t let anyone else convince you that you aren’t smart enough, beautiful enough, or just enough. Oh and eat your veggies. It will change your life.

  15. Lei says:

    I’d say you are stronger than you realize. Slow down. Breathe. Look up. Never mind what others think or say about you, it’s your life so live it like you want. Love. When your heart breaks which it will, just breathe, feel all the emotions that surface, and let it go. Hug yourself. Smile and laugh. Surround yourself with people you want to be like. Be kind to everyone especially chikdren, the elderly and our animal friends. When someone cuts you off in traffic or the grocery parking lot or line let them go and bless them. Upon rising each morning say thank you for another day. Upon sleeping say thank you. Exercise in whatever way is fun to you. Share. Enjoy nature. Enjoy your friends and family. This top shall pass. You can’t change anyone, only your self. Letgo of ideals and expectations. Just live. Travel. Celebrate everyday. Surround yourself with what you love. Be your own best friend.

  16. Mary-Anne says:

    Let go and let God! Believe that every struggle is actually a gift you can learn and grow from, embrace it, cherish and love it. Forgive everyone whoever hurt you or will hurt you, when you hold on to the anger, you lose a little bit of your soul. Step gently on the earth, remain conscious of every living thing around you, turn off the TV, eat more veggies, spend more time daydreaming and don’t be in such a hurry to grow up. LIfe is not a race, it’s a long and winding trail, a beautiful blessing, a time to nourish our spirits, to make the world better and to leave behind a legacy of love and peace and light that will last forever. And most importantly, to thank God and talk to Him everyday, He is real, He is there for all of us.

  17. Sally says:

    I would tell her to love herself no matter what, to be her own best friend, to trust her gut instincts and judgment about how to live her life. Stop listening to the nay-sayers and gain confidence in herself. I would also counsel her to take a more relaxed attitude toward life, not to be so serious and intense. Teach her about impermanence and change, and how to be resilient by letting things come and go and not getting so attached to having things go her way, because they won’t.

  18. Traci says:

    You’ll come back around to the things that you love at the core of your being, so don’t try to avoid them in the first place. Follow your passions 100% of the time.

    • Kate says:

      I recently discovered how magical it is to follow my pleasures. De – sire means “Of the Father”. I know that our desires, our passions, our pleasures are placed in our soul for a reason. We are meant to have them.

  19. Darlene says:

    Love….. Hard to find sometimes, but it sure makes everything feel better.

    Follow it from within than without and you will seldom go wrong in finding it.

  20. Peter says:

    Rough days will come, but you will survive them and prosper. Read The Hero with a Thousand Faces to know what to expect. Put your goals out to the universe and accept that they will be delivered. Keep up the meditations, work out who your real friends are and tell them so. Spread love, happiness and humor to all around you.

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