Emotional Health

Avoid advice overload. You got this.

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Hello gorgeous!

When I started my blog I didn’t know it would become a business. I loved helping people and I wanted to make it a full-time job. Though I had no idea how to do that, my gut told me to try anyway. And so the adventure begins…

But like most great adventures, I was lost in the beginning, and when you’re lost, it’s natural to seek guidance. Well, I went a little overboard with my need to gather opinions. In fact, I collected so many confusing recommendations that I got totally overwhelmed and almost quit.

Today I want to share some of the worst advice I’ve ever received and how you can benefit by not listening.

Hands down, my biggest mistakes came from not believing that I had the ability to figure it out. And truth be told, I wanted someone to save me, to do the work for me. I think this is called Prince Charming syndrome. Whatever it is, I desperately wanted to be taken care of, not surprising since I decided to change my career in the middle of a huge health crisis.

As a result, I listened to potential investors, business partners and advisors. “Launch a non-profit, create a school, be a reality TV star, design state of the art tongue scrapers.” Oiy, I’m getting tired just remembering this stuff. I listened to consultants, agencies and think tanks. I listened to well-meaning friends and family (who had never launched a business). And oh boy did I listen to the media, critics and especially bad reviews.

Then one day, I stopped listening.

I remember the afternoon I took my entrepreneurial life by the ovaries and said, everyone OUT. I got this! Now mind you, I still didn’t know how exactly “I got this” but I was tired of the noise and I knew that I’d be fine if I got laser focused and listened to my inner wisdom.

Sometimes the only person who can save you is you. I’m not saying we shouldn’t get advice from others. Useful advice can be the difference between success and failure. But more often than not, too much advice kills our mission and mojo. There’s no way around rolling up our sleeves and doing the work. You may need some training (I did). You may fail and fall (I still do), but if you have the passion and vision, the path to success is easier than you think.

What can you offer the world? Hint: plenty!

What message do you have to share? Why is that message important to you? (This is essential because when you forget, your work suffers). Where is the need for your service, product or expertise? How can you deliver it in a unique way?

Hint: Be yourself and test your crazy ideas. Are other people charging for the same knowledge or talent you have? If you can’t answer these questions yet, no worries. Just allow them to get the wheels turning and the creativity flowing.

This isn’t the moon landing, there’s no need to overcomplicate your vision.

No matter what we’re struggling with, the more we look within for solutions, the clearer the path becomes.

Needing to take action is inevitable, but it doesn’t have to be aimless or confusing.

When it came to my health, I ultimately decided to tune out the fear mongering noise and start taking care of myself. Not everything I tried worked, but the more I checked in with my inner guide, the less likely I was to waste my time with the latest fad. As for my business, my focus became clear and simple: write useful-fun-awesome stuff, give lots of it away for free, and occasionally charge for the rest. This allowed me to support my readers, my family and a whole bunch of other families—my Crazy Sexy Team.

Peace & you got this,

Add a comment
  1. Estel says:

    It’s amazing how things could change in a moment. Just listening some words, just reading some beautiful post … 😉

    These last weeks I was really feeling stucked and wondering how my future would look like if I continued the same way. So I was feeling conscious of how I could start changing something in my life and in myself this moment right now. I end up thinking about doing a blog. Sharing my experiences with health and my search to cure. It just feels so good in my gut and it will help me put some words in what I’m living and at the same time maybe inspiring someone. Who knows… Just being exited of how I will feel if I’m brave enough of starting doing so. I don’t want to share it so much now with family or friends as I don’t want to be overwhelmed with their opinions whether negative or positive. I’ll just start step by step, with a bit of courage and a pinch of salt!

    Thanks for your light xx Great health and love! xo xo

  2. Jenn says:

    Hello Kris,

    As I was looking through your posts I stumbled upon this one and I have to say that it was just what I needed to read. Sometimes I find it can be as they say “hard to see the trees through the forest” but I think if I follow what feels right then I’ll be going in the right direction. Thank you as always for the kind words.

    xo
    Jenn

  3. Bridget says:

    Kris~ Thank you so much for this blog post!
    I’d been struggling to find the audience I want to serve, but I kept feeling lost.. confused and stressed! Today, I’d just came to realize that right now I just want to take care of me and share the inspiration that sparks along this journey!! I’d never thought of doing blogging, but the idea came to me today. Reading this blog post today almost seemed like it was meant for me to see it to help me get on with the idea that came to me today!

    So thank you for your inspiration! Thank you for your love, thank you for being Kris Carr!!! 😀

    With Infinite Love & Gratitude,
    Bridget

  4. Nicky says:

    Kris! to say you have come into my life at the most opportune moment is a massive understatement 🙂

    Your work resonates with so closely and this article in-particular feels like the permission I needed to STOP – and listen to me.

    I have spent countless hours and dollars looking for the “best” solution in others. How freeing to know it is all with in ME 🙂

    I will be stalking you for a little while now haha.

    “the world needs more examples and less opinions” – I forget who said it 😉

    Thank you for being an example,

    Nicky Thomas

  5. Collette Ryan says:

    love your work Kris
    just reading your book as we speak and it’s awesome
    bless you!
    xo

  6. Alexandra says:

    Thanks for this advice. My friend and I have started a website called Contented Belly which is focused on fructose malabsorption (which I was diagnosed with two years ago), celiac disease, lactose intolerance, and other digestive issues. We are at the beginning of our website journey and we have been given a lot of advice. The concept of trusting our guts and listening to ourselves is a lesson we need to remember.

  7. Luis says:

    Tough topic. Thanks Kris!

  8. michele grant says:

    I just read this post and sooo resonated with it.

    It took me a while to realise that not all advice is GOOD, though its all well-meaning, sometimes subjective and sometimes well-informed.

    Over the last 6 months I’ve been trying to get my head round what I wanted to do next. I sought so much advice my head was in a twirl. But I kept coming back to a blog with the intention of making it a business. Once I decided that was my path I felt so liberated and excited. And suddenly…. things fell into place.

    I was going to go for your B-school this year, signed up to your B-school facebook page but then realised that actually if I really wanted to get the most out of B-school I needed to get that blog up and running first. So feeling sad I’m not on B-school this year but know it was right decision and determined to be ready for 2016 !

    Thanks for all your inspirational stuff.

  9. Aaaah, beautiful- just what I needed to hear! I’m definitely at a stage in my life where I’m blocking out all the noise from outside and just going within. It’s all about trusting yourself enough to listen and act on whatever it is you find.

    Thank you lovely Kris- xx

  10. Andi says:

    Thank you so much for sharing this story! I am in the midst myself of trying to figure out how to help people. Some days I sit down and think “this is so random and crazy! do I really know what I’m doing? How did I end up on this path?” But most of the time I am super excited about creating a career that I love AND helping people. And yes, there are days I want to quit. I think it’d be much easier to just stick out and stay in my day job and use my free time to spend with friends, family and traveling instead of trying to build a health coaching career. But that wouldn’t serve me nor would it serve others. So I just keep plugging along one turtle step at a time everyday, every week, every month. My big thing is definitely getting back in tune with my gut and listening to my intuition. Thank you again for this post.

    Warmly,
    Andi

  11. Deb says:

    You never mention chemobrain….this is a REAL dis-ease & it has affected my life…I cannot do online seminars…but I do want to change my life…I changed eating in a radical way but this has really defeated me…

    http://www.curetoday.com/articles/ChemobrainIts-Real-Its-Complex-and-the-Science-Is-Still-Evolving

  12. Barbara says:

    Kris, Your blog is just another angelic message confirming that concerning my health dilemma, I am choosing to go within and dig deep for guidance ! Love you Kris

  13. Kathleen says:

    Hi Kris,

    I need advise. I am done with chemo. My hair will be arriving by March end. I want to start dating. My wig looks great. How, when, do you tell someone? I am in the best shape of my life. I see no reason to wait. I have had 2 brushes with little c last 5 years. This past fall it grew legs and spread. 95% gone. I am plant based, juicer extrodinaire. Thoughts?

  14. Suki Johnson says:

    I have suffered from chronic inflammation, fibromyalgia, dystonia in all the muscles of both hands and arms, and recently, after years of pain, I had major back surgery (8 screws, 3 rods and 3 cages). I’m currently in physical therapy and pool therapy, but I can’t take any anti-inflammatory meds for six months from surgery, which will be June. Because of the way they had my arms laid out when I had surgery, I am now also suffering from excruciating upper inner arm pain. So my question is, what one thing helped you the MOST in getting rid of chronic inflammation? I feel like my whole body is inflamed right now. I’m so excited to read about all the things you’ve done to remove your inflammation, but I’d really like to start with the one that helped you the most! Thank you!

  15. Laura roman says:

    Hi Kris,
    It is as if you were reading my tea leaves. I have struggled with my ability to make what I want a reality. Thanks to you, I discovered Marie Forleo and B-School. However, I kept looking for someone else to do it for me. I’ve spent too much time and money waiting for someone else to show me the path. It is only recently that I have decided to find path by myself (with some techno help) . I have tons of experience both professionally and personally and feel called to share my stuff on line. Thanks for the blog, it hit my soul.
    Laura

  16. Bea says:

    Thank you Kris, really thought provocing article. The best thing about turning 40 is that I now have the guts to believe that I know what’s best for me and nobody else. After all, I have known myself for 40 years and “the experts” haven’t.
    Thank you for your wonderful site, long time reader, but first time commenter.

  17. Lisa Dean says:

    Working at that time, but saw another post and super excited we will have access to it later! Thanks so much for your inspiration.

  18. Tara says:

    You rock Kris!!! Thanks for blogging and sharing your wisdom with the world. I stay true to myself and clear about what I want through continuing to read inspiring reads/videos/books from YOU (I love crazy sexy diet/cancer– brother had a brain tumor this year and it’s really changed my perspective) , Mastin Kipp, and Gabriel Berinstien— when I feel I need some guidance! Appreciate the motivation. I’ve got it! Much love, Tara from NOLA — also… Come to New Orleans to speak? We need Kris Carr!

  19. Karen Silverman says:

    Hi Kris: All I can say is – you are such an inspiring leader! thank you for being you! xoxo, Karen

  20. Kristina says:

    Hi Kris! Yes, I am totally with you, turning inwards is the best decision ever! I think it´s a universal mechanism to drive you crazy to HELP you turn to yourself. That´s how I see it now. If they had been more tactful and wise, I may have still been listening, and never have run right back home to myself to find the goldmine that is there if I tune in!! So it´s about letting it get to you and booking more dates with yourself and your meditation spot!
    All the best! Kristina

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