Dearest Friends,
Like many of you, I’ve been watching the tragic events that have unfolded in Louisiana, Minnesota, Dallas and around the world, and my initial impulse is to feel helpless and hopeless.
In times like these, we want change and we want it now. We want leaders and people with voices to do something.
Sadly, we’ve also seen these moments come and go. A tragedy takes place and it saturates the news (who often exploit it for ratings). Basically, there’s a swell of interest and outrage but often nothing happens. Then it quickly dies down, and it’s back to the same problems and lack of solutions.
It’s soul-crushing.
So what do we do? Well, I certainly don’t have the answers, but a few thoughts come to mind and I’m going to challenge myself to share them. Now, I know some of you may not give two craps what I think, and I completely respect that. You want healthy recipes and wellness tips. You want to feel uplifted and you gravitate to me for that.
So this is a risk, and I ask you to respect that it’s not easy to put yourself out there, even for me.
Therefore, if I offend you, I’m sorry. But if I make you think, I’m not. It’s because I love our world that I’m taking the time to write this. And as always, I welcome your thoughtful comments because my readers are brilliant.
First, each and every one of us has a voice. And each and every one of us has work to do. If we have anger in our hearts, it’s time to look at it and heal it. If we have judgement in our hearts, it’s time to look at it and heal it. If we have prejudice in our hearts, it’s time to look at it and heal it. If we think we’re better or less than someone else, it’s time to shift that thinking. And if we think we have all the answers, think again.
Rest assured, I’m putting myself through the same paces. I’m also asking myself questions like: What fears do I need to face? And what actions do I need to take to help transform myself and my community? One that comes to mind is to vote—at both the national and local level. Folks worked very hard for our right to have our voices heard. Make sure to exercise that right.
I invite you to seriously examine these ideas and questions.
And I’m sure you’ve got a list of your own. Because while prayers and condolences are spiritually essential, they’re not enough. I’m tired of just praying (though I won’t stop). And I’m really tired of how polarizing honest and necessary conversations have become.
This is truly hard for me to admit, but for the first time in my life I find myself writing people off because of their political and social beliefs. I silently say to myself, “Oh, you think that way? Well, you’re wrong, I’m right, and we’re done.” That’s the last thing I should ever say to myself.
Those thoughts are the seeds that sow isolation, separateness and strife. Clearly, I have more work to do on myself.
We find ourselves in extremely divisive times and you and I are being called to put our best selves forward. It’s going to take an entire societal shift to raise our consciousness, heal our past and strengthen our future—a future in which unity is a sacred value. But if we want that unity, we’ve got to address some major issues blocking our path to freedom.
We need to talk about and take action on racism.
It’s real. And while I never use cancer as a metaphor (because I live it), racism is our nation’s cancer, and it’s destroying people.
We need to talk about and take action on sexism.
Women are not property or second class citizens to control, exploit or manipulate. If we wouldn’t treat a man a certain way, we best not treat a woman that way either.
We need to talk about and take action on bigotry—to see past labels of every kind and into the soul of each person.
Love is love, and we sure need more of it in the world.
We need to talk about and take action on violence.
By any sane standard, we’ve got a problem. Yet working toward solutions has become impossible because all sides of the argument are so deeply entrenched. Isn’t it time we have the courage to tackle complex issues in a holistic way? When any of our dear sisters and brothers are hurting, we’re all hurting. How many more people must die before we do something? Even if doing something means compromise.
Lastly, the energy we bring to this world matters.
And when I refer to this world, I include online comments because we are either contributing to the healing and harmony of the planet or we’re stoking the fires of violence and oppression. Don’t be a troll. Let’s voice our opinions in a way that make people think, rather than spewing bile and hiding behind Facebook. What we say and how we say it matters. And if you wouldn’t say it to someone’s face, don’t say it at all. This isn’t about political correctness, it’s about human decency.
Also, by no means is this the full list of what our society is facing, these are just the topics on my mind as I sit here and try to make sense of recent events.
So, while we’re waiting for politicians, celebrities, activists and organizers to do something, let’s also remember our role. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. Be good and respectful to yourself and others during these trying times. Reflect on your own thoughts, actions and blind spots, and I will do the same.
You are wonderful.
Peace,
Thank you so much for using your voice and your platform to speak on this. Even when we intellectually believe that we need to end racism, police brutality, sexism, violence against women, gun violence, homophobia, discrimination of all kinds, so rarely it seems do we go deep enough to honestly examine our own prejudices and judgments. Because they still exist, even if we feel we’re on the right side of history with our vote and our beliefs. Unconscious bias is dangerous, and we must recognize that there’s always more work to be done, within and without. Thank you for encouraging honest reflection and open dialogue, as well as intentional loving action.
Love this 🙂
Kris, thank you. Your books & blog gave me hope while in treatment. You continue to be a wonderful bright beacon of light, joy & inspiration.. You are a extraordinary gift to the world.
Spot on Kris, well said!
Kudos to you for being not only open and vulnerable (on your blog) and also very direct; every individual must challenge themselves to listen without prejudice, and not be prey to the controlling influencers who would steal our sovereign human right to think for ourselves.
Your thoughts and insights helped lift up my heart and even my soul. It takes right thinking to change behavior.
lovely Kris.
What you write about polarizing and division is so true. I want to be part of the beauty, part of the solution. It’s too easy to be mean and argumentative. It’s meaningful and real to show up for people and to be positive. Thank you, Kris–
Thank you so much Kris. This is exactly the kind of message the world needs, especially today.
Thank you for being brave enough to raise your voice,
Helen
Thank you for sharing your thoughts which mirror my own. You articulated them here on the page.. We can do something.. something small.. making shifts one word at a time.
In grief and love,
Tamara
Thank you for your thoughtful and heartfelt expressions. It is important for people to talk, to listen – truly listen to each other, and for each one of us to ask ourselves who we want to be and what kind of world we want to live in. You mentioned that people look to you for information on wellness, etc but you are respected for your whole self – not just your areas of expertise – and you have a platform as a result. It is important for you to use that platform to speak out like you have here. I applaud you for that, and for all you do and have done for myself and the world. Blessings to you dear Kris. ♡
Dear Kris,
You are so right. It is up to each of us to reflect and put our own house in order. We each need to become mindful of what we say and think because all those words and thoughts gravitate to a pool of either positive or negative energy. This is what is termed mass consciousness and each of us does add to both these energies all the time each minute and moment of our existences.
Thanks for reminding us of this universal law of creation Kris
Love, Peace and Light to all Lorraine Watts
Beautiful Kris – I don’t follow you because you have healthy recipes & wellness tips – I follow you because you have a beautiful, warm, loving and wise heart. This thoughtful and heartfelt post is just one more example of your goodness – thank you for sharing your thoughts and ideas about what to do in the face of all this tragedy and sadness. As Ghandi said – “You must be the change you want to see in the world” Thank you this beautiful reminder and for all your posts (and yummy recipes & wellness tips too) I wish you and all the world peace and many blessings always.
Hi Kris,
Thank you for taking the risk and talking about the big ol’ juicy elephant in the room. I have so much to say on the topic of systemic racism in our country, though I am certainly not an “expert” on the topic–not even remotely.
I’m a white, 40 year-old woman, liberal-minded, “conscious” person who was born into a “spiritually-minded” family– I have a rich interior life and am no stranger to doing “inner work”. My mother taught yoga when she was pregnant with me–I’ve practiced yoga since childhood (though off and on). She was holistically minded when it came to nutrition and “alternative” approaches starting back in the early 70’s. I say all of this not because I want to bore you with my life story, but because I believe that in many ways your audience may find themselves in some of my “labels.”
Having said all of that, I have now had a total of 4, candid conversations about race, and systemic racism, which whether we want to look at it or not is our national inheritance– in my entire life… These conversations have all taken place since last Tuesday. I hope that is shocking to the people who are reading this. That shocks me. Three of the conversations took place with 3 of my white friends, some I have known for over a decade. One conversation took place yesterday with an African American woman and yogi I contacted through Facebook after she commented on one of my comments on a post by a well-known yoga teacher.
You see, despite the fact that I believe that we are all the same, equal, humans, etc…, I live in an extremely white world from my city, to my neighborhood, to my clients, to my friends, to who I see at Whole Foods and in my yoga class… “My world” enables me not to “deal” with issues of race because its not something I encounter in my daily life, which is and example of what is meant by the term white privilege… People of color do not have the option to not deal with issues of race. Ever.
I know I am not alone when I say that all of the events that took place last week were devastating to witness; I implore you to use those feelings of empathy and compassion to take external action in some way in your community, whether that is as simple as exploring the reality of implicit racial bias that NONE of us are exempt from (regardless of our “spiritual” practices) with other people in your life. Be brave. I know it’s hard, use what you’ve learned from the works of of Tara Mohr or Brene Brown or many others to be brave and participate in the conversation that most of us have no experience having. It feels tabu, I know, that you tell us something– do it anyway. I promise you will feel better afterwards. Then do it again.
I can’t tell you how healing and hopeful I felt yesterday after spending an hour and a half on the phone with the African American yogi who was willing to talk with me about race and specifically her experience as a woman of color within the predominately white yoga world who for the most part remained silent about last weeks events.
I fumbled at first, my pulse was even racing before I called, I rehearsed what I would say so I didn’t sound like an idiot, and then completely forgot everything I’d prepared when she answered the phone. Which turned out to be awesome because what resulted was a very real and organic conversation sans the overly curated politically correct approach.
Y’all it was so healing on both sides. We were both grateful.
I will stop here, I’ve already written more than I intended to, but I wanted to inspire you enough to push past the belief that all we need to do is look within. That is a lie. It’s not true. If we stay there we are bypassing and hiding from hard things and actively choosing not to become part of the solution.
P.S. the next time that you are tempted to quote Gandhi’s “be the change you want to see in the world” please remember that he one of the biggest human right’s activists of the last century who used his internal/spiritual work to inform his ACTIONS in the world. Here’s my favorite quote by him:
“To me, Truth is God and there is no way to find Truth except the way of nonviolence”. Violence separates people, but the search for truth is a communal enterprise in which we have to work together.”
P.S. I’ve done a lot of research over the past week that I’d be happy to share, but I didn’t want to just dump it here without asking.
Peace,
Jennifer
That is surprising about your 3 conversations, total! I guess I haven’t thought about it…who have I spoken to about these racial attacks? My white and hispanic friends. I appreciate you making me think–
Thank you for your thoughtful words and the courage to put it out there. I’m trying to find my voice again and reading this helps.
Kris, this is so thoughtful and heartfelt. I agree with you. I don’t care what political party or religion or race you are, don’t be afraid to talk about important issues with the mindset that one can respectfully disagree, but listen (!) to what the other person has to say. Everyone single person in the world has a different attitude because we are raised under different circumstances and experiences that all contribute to the formation of our beliefs. Religious, ethnic, political, social status, education. Bring it on. We need to talk.
Thanks Kris, for your thoughtfulness and concern; also your courage to step up to the plate to say something. Your thoughts are right on.
Beautifully said. Thank you, Kris.
Thank you, Kris, for sharing your thoughts from a genuine, vulnerable place. We can all relate and appreciate your putting those ideas out there to nudge us into self-exploration and action! We need to dig deep and start being the change we want to see…must give up some precious moments here and there and take whatever action we can to help make the necessary positive changes <3
Beautiful. Thank you.
Eloquently said, as always. Thank you for speaking out!