Emotional Health

How to Rise Above Online Negativity

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Hiya Gorgeous,

My readers and the members of my Inner Circle Wellness community truly amaze me with their positivity. I’ve never seen such a loving and supportive group of people online. It’s quite a contrast to the hostility, discrimination and divisiveness we often see in today’s online world.

But, here’s what we each need to understand: we are all publishers and content creators.

We’re all contributing to the global energy. And, we get to choose—will we raise it or will we bring it down?

In truth, we have a responsibility to bring our best, brightest selves to our online activities. Just because we can be anonymous, doesn’t mean we’re entitled to act in a way that insults our own character.

Many of us don’t even realize the power our words have to touch people’s lives. Each day, we have an opportunity to set the tone in our online sandbox. Every comment, post, “like,” video or photo can lift someone up or knock them down. But sometimes, we lose sight of this potential.

Believe me, I get it.

Sometimes, I want to say a whole bunch of stuff that’s rude and righteous, but I stop myself because I know my words have power and I need to choose them very wisely.

That’s why I want to share a few examples of how I try to bring my best self to the online world—even when I’m pissed or being criticized or judged. I hope it helps if you’re ever on the fence about how to react to a situation in any other corner of the Internet.

How to Stay Positive Online

When posting or commenting on the Internet, I do the following:

  • I ask myself: Am I being decent and compassionate toward the other person with these words?
  • I re-read my post or comment and reflect on my true motivation for writing it. Is it to help? Does it respect the purpose of the space? Or, is it to vent or strike back?
  • I put it through the filter of whether I’d be proud to say those comments to the person or group face-to-face. It’s easy to forget that real, live humans are reading the words I send into the online world.
  • When I stand up for myself, I try to be as unemotional and balanced as possible. I don’t attack back or put people down. I also don’t engage trolls—they’re not worth my time (or yours). But, I often use these opportunities to encourage the other person to look at the words they use, too. If someone wants to get their point across, belittling me isn’t the way to do it—and I remind them of that.

I read thousands of comments, reviews and emails per year, so I have a lot of experience reading beautiful words of praise, polite and constructive feedback and nasty temper tantrums. While I’ve learned not to take things personally, that doesn’t mean I don’t get hurt from time to time. When that happens, I don’t respond right away. If I did, the other person would get hurt too, and that serves no one.

Now, all of this advice doesn’t mean we don’t need to be tough when necessary. I’m no doormat and neither are you. But, we can be tough but loving—we can share our opinions while also being respectful. It’s not easy, but it makes us better communicators and more tolerant people.

We all know the difference between a positive comment and a negative one—a supportive email and a mean-spirited message. The next time you want to stoop beneath yourself, step up instead.

Share love. Delete hate. Be mindful.

Contribute to a beautiful place that unites others rather than divides us. There are all different kinds of people in the world. Even if we don’t speak the same language or have a similar background, sexual orientation, political view and so on, we can still embrace kindness.

Be the change you want to see.

xo,

Add a comment
  1. Jenny Kelly says:

    Share Love, Delete Hate, Be Mindful – “The Awe Moment”
    I just Love your articles.
    A great inspirational post. I really appreciate your kind efforts.
    Thanks for sharing.

  2. linda says:

    omg , kriss … I have been working on my filters for a loooong time … I stay from people that I know filters will probably not work … people who really know me accept me for me and still love me … it’s sad that we can be so unkind to one another … a few years ago I decided that if I could make one person smile each day … just one person … I had done my job … I have been folding origami peace cranes for years … one day I realized I had shopping bags full of them and I might end up on that hoarders program … so I took them to nursing homes and hospitals and doctor’s waiting rooms … and I managed to put smiles on a lot of people … the sad part of my woeful tale is that my family really, really doesn’t know me and I stay away from since filters won’t work on … I have no idea why I am relating this story to you … I love your beautiful, sharing soul that is so uplifting … I put on my wondergirl cape that shields me from all negatively and mean stuff before I go out … you can borrow it anytime … and the “crazy sexy juice” book is delicious and beautifully put together … your animal posts are something I look forward to every week … hey, peace out girl and just rock on !!! i’m subscribed and I don’t need replies to my comments … you have so much on your plate … lol … just keep doing such wonderful work … you do it with so much joy !!!

  3. Joyce Henry says:

    Thanks for the great inspiration, Kris! I’m happily curing my cancer with healthful eating and healthful thoughts. My new mantra will be “Share Love. Delete Hate. Be Mindful.” – not only online but in my daily living. It works!

  4. Lennie Wittenberg says:

    Tonight I got a very hurtful Facebook message from someone I grew up with over 60 years. I went from Montreal to Vancouver to spend 9 days with her. It was not what I expected we both have changed. Without getting into the negative accusations she wrote to me and how hurt I am, devasting I decided to wish her well and unfriend her because I know that this was too much drama and stress in my life. I am a 4 time survivor of 2 different cancers, I live on positive thoughts and will not put up with people even though it hurts I have to walk away for my well being and sanity.

  5. Great reminders, Kris. Just what I needed today. Thanks so much for all you do!! xoxo

  6. Nancy Perry says:

    Thank you.?❤️?

  7. LINDA WEIR says:

    I LOVE YOUR SPIRIT,IT CHEERS ME UP

  8. Laura says:

    Great suggestions you always give Kris, full of light and love. Hope everything turns out well in the end (Election Speaking). Hugs n Kisses to All. Laura

  9. Kris, As always LOVE your post. And I would like a LOVE button for my keyboards!!!!!

  10. Carol says:

    Very well put. I hope those offenders read your post and change their approach to communications. Good job!

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