Hiya Gorgeous!
Today I want to share some life-changing advice I was given. We all experience fear of taking a risk and self-doubt. You know, that naggy inner voice that whispers negative nonsense that makes us feel insecure about standing out or doing things differently?
Well, sometimes we can trace that voice back to what other people have said to us (or about us). And this is what I want to work on with you today—because nobody puts baby in a corner!
Ready for one of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever received? Here goes…
What other people think about you is none of your business.
Ha! Yup, it’s their business, not yours.
The thing that matters most is what YOU think about you.
What you think about your dreams, about who you love, how you live, how you contribute to the world and so on. That’s what matters—your healthy opinion of you.
The more we rely on outside permission and validation, the less empowered we’ll feel to go our own way, share our unique gifts, or rise up to challenge injustice.
Sure, feedback can be a good and useful thing. I’m not suggesting we live in a self-indulgent bubble. I’m absolutely grateful for the times my best friend (and even my mother) have pulled me aside and encouraged me to look at things a different way. But not everyone has our best interests in mind–even when they think they do.
Therefore, discernment is really important.
We’ve gotta sift through the feedback in order to decide what’s valuable and what’s the other person’s baggage or boo boo.
Folks who like to flex their nasty or frightened muscles are often acting from a place of their own wounds. Have compassion for them but don’t let their drama dull your sparkle, dampen your dreams or plant seeds of doubt!
Again, if it’s the opinion of someone you truly trust and value, carefully look for the nugget of wisdom that could help you. But remember—their feelings aren’t your facts.
And no matter what, just keep doing your best and spreading your magic.
I’ve got a lot more to share on this topic, so press play to get my take on how to stay in your power, so you don’t let other people’s opinions tear you down.
In this video you’ll learn:
- How self-doubt plagues us all
- More nuggets from the best advice I’ve ever gotten
- Tips for staying focused—not afraid
- How to deal with haters and rise above negativity
Feelin’ inspired? I sure hope so! You are meant for great things, sweetheart. Believe in yourself. This is your one great life and you get to decide how you want to live it.
Your turn: How would your life improve if you weren’t so worried about what other people thought? Or if you have advice for how to handle criticism, please let us know! Leave a comment below.
Peace and kindness,
Interestingly this very sentence has been circulating in my mind for a while now, and serves as a healthy affirmation , “I am responsible for my life, others are responsible for theirs”. To tell you the truth, it helps me blossom and accept…me.
I suppose it takes the weight off of my shoulders, anyone*s shoulders, to release the imagined responsability for others.
Bless you Kris, you are the best!
Most annoying when you are criticized by people who do not understand the problem at all. Couch experts. How to deal with such people?
Hy Kriss,
I´m from Germany. I heared the wonderful flow summit. Your interview was so brilliant. Thank you. At the moment
i am reading your book crazy sexy gesund. I love it. Thanks a lot. I´m a yoga teacher and i love so wonderful thinks you have told us.
I loved this post and the video. I’ve been holding myself back from kickstarting my life into the direction that I want to see it take, because of fear – fear about doing the right/wrong thing. Well, if it’s right for me, right now, then it’s the right thing, right?! ?
Thank you!?
Hi, I haven’t read this article yet (I will after this comment), because the title makes me very excited and I went straight to reactive mode. I’m often concerned with what other people think of me, even with people I don’t even like that much myself or people I will encounter just the one time. To say the least, it frustrates me very much to be concerned with this because I know that what people think more often than not, has nothing to do with me but with them. I also know it doesn’t really matter: it’s about how you feel about yourself. If you can accept yourself completely, rejection by others is not really possible anymore even though on the surface/the form/manifestation it may look like you got rejected (maybe you get fired or your partner breaks up with you). The “none of your business part” of the title somehow gives a “little” nuance or different perspective to this concern I have going on. That makes me smile and excited. Some things I find obvious and logic but sometimes you “need” someone else to point that out for you. Yes, of course it’s none of my business (I just got my Homer Simpson doh moment, maybe that’s why I’am smiling). I will remember it. Thank you. Now, I’am off reading the article (and others, you got some cool articles, thank you).
Kris you are so genuine, wonderful and caring. I listened to you with tears in my eyes, because it was so comforting to hear such genuine,caring advice.