Hiya Gorgeous!
Exactly 16 years ago this week, I got the scariest news I could imagine—and yet, this news ultimately changed my life for the so-much-better.
If you’re new to my story, on Valentine’s Day 2003, I was diagnosed with a rare and incurable stage IV cancer.
Even after a decade and a half, I STILL have trouble wrapping my mind around it. I mean… If you didn’t know me, you’d probably never guess that I’ve already far outlived the 10 years my docs predicted.
So much has changed for me since the day that ultimately reset my entire life.
I radically changed my diet and lifestyle and shared my journey and lessons along the way.
I fell in love and got married. Left New York City for fresh air and mountain living in Woodstock. I started my own business and dedicated the last 16 years to teaching others how to take back their health and their power—while also caring for the planet and animals.
Cancer made all that happen. It woke me up and shook me to pieces, and yet it taught me how to put myself back together stronger.
Cancer also rocked my world for the second time when my amazing dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Many of you “met” him in my film Crazy Sexy Cancer or you listened to his powerful message in our interview for The Healing Cancer World Summit a few months ago.
Since that time, my dad has had a few setbacks, including a recurrence and another surgery. He’s doing much better now—which is our biggest blessing. But more than the condition of his health, it’s my dad’s brilliant and resilient spirit that continues to be my teacher. (Love you, dad!)
So as I reflect on another cancerversary, I’m actually filled with gratitude.
Cancer sucks, don’t get me wrong. But it’s “gifted” me with this constant reminder that life does not last forever—for ANY of us.
Before my diagnosis, I was flailing in certain areas. As much as I’d love to change that part of my personal story, there’s SO MUCH good to be found in it.
And since it’s part of my life, I’m determined to wring every last lesson from it—and share those nuggets with you. One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is this:
Life is NOW. Don’t wait it away.
Want to take a belly dancing course? Go for it!
Go to Italy and swim in the healing sea? There’s a sale on plane tix and bikinis!
Want to write a book, a song, a poem? Get going!
Teach yoga? I’d love to take your class!
Launch your own line of vegan treats for pets, become a midwife? Yes, please!
Or maybe you want to slow down, get off the hamster wheel and live simpler. Permission granted!
Yes, I know all too well that this is easier said than done… As a kid, I was so fearful and timid. I know, that may be hard to believe, but I’m an introvert in extrovert’s apparel.
My mom was (and is) fearless. When I was young, she had a successful corporate gift business. I’d tag along with her to industry trade shows where we’d check out the latest products in the gift industry, including gourmet food, jewelry, home decor, stationary—you name it.
Many of the exhibitors offered samples of their goods to attendees. If there was something that caught my eye, I’d try to get my mom to ask them for a sample.
No way.
My mom was firm. “Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there” she said. “If you want it, you need to get up there and ask. They won’t bite, the worst they can say is ‘no.’” And “no” to my mom is just a slight detour telling you to find another way.
So here’s this shy kid in the midst of all these business owners representing some major buying power… talk about feeling out of my league!
Over time, though, I learned that she was right. If I was willing to ask, folks were often willing to give. If I didn’t ask, though, I didn’t grow. So I took my mom’s lesson to heart and stretched myself.
Cut to my diagnosis, I realized that as brave as I thought I was, I was still playing small. I might have “grown up,” but I was still that timid little girl, afraid to step up, ask questions, push back when needed and ultimately own my power.
There’s nothing like a cancer diagnosis to light a fire under you.
I looked at my life and resolved to live big and true to myself, no matter how scared I got. I simply didn’t have the time to put anything off.
Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed… for ANYONE. So if you have a dream (and I know you do…), get a move on, oh magical one!
Everyone has something special stirring inside… A passion to do/be/have/give/create something—or to take what exists and make it better with their own special sauce. Yum!
I’m here to tell you, if you’re pulled to something greater in your life, you owe it to your wonderful self and the world to go after it!
And if you’re scared to try, for fear you’ll fail, listen to the advice my dad gave me when I was 15 years old and afraid to sing at my school recital. He told me to take a deep breath and silently whisper two words to myself: “Fuck it”—then get out there and sing!
There are no safety nets. No guarantees. Sometimes we’ll fall down, but when we do, we gotta get up and try again. The people, animals and planet need us too.
I hope my story, with all of its up and downs, inspires you. But I’m not the only one with lessons to share. You are a juggernaut of sunshine and talent. So seize the day, take all your so-called lemons and make champagne.
Squeeze every moment of the ride while you have breath in your body and fire in your heart.
Your turn: What’s something you’ve learned from life’s challenges, twists and turns? I’d love to hear about it in the comments below!
Peace and living big,
The right words/reminder, at the right moment. I am following you since a couple of years and I spread your message wherever I can. I wish you a Happy Anniversary and more than the best – Today, Tomorrow and Then! A big hug with a big kiss from Germany.
Just like for Maria in Germany, your words here Kris, (as I read this on April 10th – a LITTLE behind on reading my emails!?) , were exactly what I needed to read at exactly the right time. Kris, you are ALWAYS like a best friend I’ve known and loved forever, and how I thank you for that! I thank God for you always, and pray for your healing as you continuously add to the healing of each one of us with the blessings of reading, listening to, and watching your most-sincere compassionate gifts bestowed upon us all. Lots of Love to you – and Maria and everyone else on here ????????
Cancer helped me to slow down, value who I am and everything I have, love and cherish life even more than before, and give birth to my project „Der beherzte Patient“ („The Courageous Patient“), where I try to encourage people to actively find and follow their individual healing paths. However, since cancer is recurring again and again, I start becoming a bit more radical in who I really am and what my life‘s vocation really is, meaning: fearlessly growing on the right level.
dear kris!
your examples are kind of funny: I start a yoga teacher training this year and I really want to write a book (about our beloved dog “bingo”)… ? – I love love love your messages, I really do! hugs from switzerland!!! ?
It’s amazing how sometimes the setbacks are the biggest blessings. I was just doing a writing exercise where I charted my life’s messes and successes. The pattern I immediately saw was the messes quickly turn to successes, or at least lead there. And sometimes I had messes and successes going on at the same time which was proof to me of the forward momentum. Sometimes things don’t work out. SOmetimes they do. THe important thing is to keep on trucking.
Dear Kris,
I am so touched by your lovely email. I read it right after finding out that a relative I hadn’t met lost his life when he went out to get a newspaper…. Yes, “just like that” things happen.
Regarding your question about a challenge… I know this does not compare with the magnitude of your experience, but some months ago I started to lose my thick hair at an alarming rate. I’ve had quite a few meltdowns about it, but now that I have a pretty good idea of the causes, I thank my hair for lighting a fire under me! After years of supporting others to grow and heal, I’ve embarked on my own healing journey. I am becoming more empowered, more humbled before this amazing human body, and so much better to myself!
THANK YOU for being an ally on this journey, and for everything you give of yourself with so much compassion and generosity. I wish you and your family all the best.
Chris. Thank you so much for sharing such a heartfelt story. You are such an inspiration to many, especially to me. My life changed significantly too back in 2000 and I had to give up so much that had been my life and work for many years. Having just read this post, I know I can push myself like you, in spite of my disability and those ‘feeling sorry for myself’ days. I am sure you have moments when you don’t feel strong just as I do. I sincerely hope that during those moments, you can find strength from knowing how many of us love you, wish you well and pray for you. I admire you immensely Chris as I am sure many others do as well. Stay well and true to your wonderful, sweet and precious self. You truly are a gift to us all. Thank you. xxx
Super powers are not college degrees!!
Hi Kris!
3 weeks after I graduated college, I was diagnosed with stage IIIB Melanoma with a 50/50 chance of living 5 years. 3 months later my mom was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma.
We then went into fight mode (found YOU) read books about food, learned yoga, meditation, and QiGong! My corporate accounting job that was “waiting for me” was just waiting for my college degree and not me as a human being so I QUIT that Sh*t! Started working with my family at a development co and opened a yoga center to build a community resource center for when sh*t hits the fan.
Now we’re 7 years out and your post this morning made my day – because some days you wake up and are like “did that REALLY happen? Or was that a dream about someone who looked like me?”
And it’s days like that they can cripple you or push you – lately they’ve been crippling me from moving forward to learning more about holistic modalities and doing my meditations and figuring out the bigger questions. So thank you for this post that I could wake up to today ??
“The power of being joyful through the journey”
I’m 54 and in May 2017 I was diagnosed with a “stage IV breast cancer” of uncertainty behavior and metastasis to bones… So I definitely love your story, the message and I’m also a living proof of mind-body self healing!!!
Dear Kris,
Your emails, meditations and positive ideas have kept me going. I had a hysterectomy, two lots of chemo and am undergoing a second lot of radiation to try to eradicate the cancers that have come out of my pelvis and invaded the skin in my pubic area. It is very uncomfortable to sit and walk but I am in good health so can use a mini trampoline. I have followed a veg/fruit juice, smoothie, natural food diet for about 12 months now and today was told by the radiation oncologist that she may not be able to make things better for me. Thank you for keeping me motivated and positive.
Fearless and tenacious! I remember that you were quite a fast study! 800 or so booths later you worked up just enough gumption to ask the daunting question, “Do you sell samples?” Some vendors said no, but you kept asking and then came the answer you were hoping for, “Yes we do!” You grew very tall that day and marched off proudly with the spoils – a glitzy rhinestone barrette. Your persistence paid off! What a great memory. Proud Mama❤️
One of the best pieces of advice I ever received was that there are gifts in every situation – be open to the gifts. Sometimes they are obvious and sometimes they are subtle. They may come in the form of great news and outcomes or as a hug, a kind word or finding that I am stronger than I ever imagined. This perspective – being open to the gifts – has helped to transform my life.
Congratulations on Sweet 16! Here’s to many more!! Like you, two different cancers over 4 years sent me on a journey of health and wellness, discovery and appreciation, and a new career. Now doing health coaching, I am writing my first book. You were there for me at the start of my journey — CSD was the first book I read — and I am grateful for that! Thank you!
Happy Sweet 16. You are such an inspriation to me. I was so impressed by your spririt when I first saw you in a documentary (Food Matters i think) a couple of years ago. Five months ago I was diagnosed with stage IV lung Cancer. My oncologist says its incurable and offered a wait and watch approach, meaning I can avoid chemo and radiation for now. I have read all or your books, and others, watched every documentatary I could find and have completely changed my lifestyle. Hearing your story has been such a blessing for me and gives me hope that I can succeed in kicking cancers butt.
This is so great. I love your statement, “I’m an introvert in extrovert’s apparel.” I sometimes feel this way and you gave language to it. Thank you!
Your story is truly a miracle. I’m present to how what could have been a tragedy, you transformed into a miracle and have impacted thousands in a way that likely would not have happened without the cancer. God uses all circumstance for our good!
I love your posts and it’s inspiring to read how to thrive with such a challenge… you feel like a cheerleader to living life more fully and to remember self-care. I was affected by cancer three times in three family members in the space of a couple of years leaving me feeling like I was crawling through life, unable to even remember what being happy or fun felt like… it had all become so serious and hard. But I find myself just emerging, smiling or doing something new just for a bit and I’m starting to feel like I might not only survive this but I will feel different but me again. I am even making green smoothies (thanks for the smoothie challenge!).
I still think you’re the cat’s meow! Thank you!
The belief that life ought to be defined by a Grand Finale tends to postpone JOY. Greater POWER lies in your present experience. I love your Dad’s whispered advice. I concur. Now get out there and sing.
I love you, Kris Carr!!
Reading this is like a jump-starter for some things I’ve been thinking about. I write an every-two-week essay that goes out to a lot of people, and my focus is: “be aware of the world around you from the tiny thorn on the rose bush to the delight of upstate NY’s rare winter sunshine. And make the most of each day!” But I don’t always follow my own advice. Your blog today, is poking my awareness and pushing me to do and say some things I’ve put off doing and saying. So — thank you. 🙂
It can be hard to follow our own advice sometimes, Carol! Glad this served as a good reminder. Mwah!
Inspiring words, Kris. I just passed my six month cancerversary. Still some worries, but I try to live your advice. Don’t wait. It’s not like I’m living big…instead, I’m learning to be quiet. To wait. To make eating well my priority. I’ve learned the Yang Tai Chi Short form, which is relaxing. I read books–both self-help and distracting good reads. I sleep nine hours a night because I need it. I had written a first draft of a memoir years ago…now I’m writing a whole new book. Now is the time. Thanks for the nudge.
Sounds like you’re doing lots of wonderful things to care for yourself, Martha. Can’t wait to read your book ;-). Sending you so much love!