Hi Friend,
Every time I see a cardinal, I know my grandmother is with me.
This regal, red bird was Grandma’s favorite. It reminds me of her fiery Colombian spirit and the blue flames that blazed in her restaurant’s kitchen. Grandma infused her food with love, captivating stories and copious amounts of butter. And everyone who slipped into a booth at The Village Gourmet in Pawling, NY felt that love from their taste buds to their toes.
I swear my grandmother’s been sending me flocks of cardinals in her absence. I think she knew I’d be needing these precious symbols of her love. Two weeks before she died, I received my own walloping wake up call. Incurable cancer. I needed a lifeline. I needed my Grandma. So I went into the kitchen—and I’ve never left.
Although Grandma’s passion had led me to the power of food, not all of her recipes were healthy. I kept her gusto and the love that she put into her cuisine, but ditched the ingredients that bought her a one-way ticket to arthritis, diverticulitis and a host of other inflammatory conditions.
I also ditched my own addictions and compulsions around food.
At one of my lowest points, sugar had a painful grip on me.
I’d buy/binge and then beat myself up over my behavior. Sometimes the only way out of my drug trance was to mutilate my stash before burying it in the trash. This step was very important. If I didn’t jam cigarette stubs into the pints of Ben & Jerry’s or spray them with cleaning products, there was a 50/50 chance I’d rummage through the rubbish to rescue my heroine.
One thousand donuts could not fill the suffering growing inside me. Which makes a lot of sense, because, since when are donuts miracle workers? Miracles require an overall, tectonic shift toward love and life’s sweetness, which couldn’t be further from processed sugar’s deceptive and fleeting high.
My kitchen was (and still is) a peaceful haven — fully stocked with nutrient-dense, plant-empowered, whole foods. It’s my direct connection to spirit, and of course, my juicer! Slowly, as my time in the kitchen deepened, I started to feel better.
While I may never be in remission from cancer, I am currently in remission from an unhealthy relationship to food.
For more than 15 years now, I’ve been teaching others (like glorious you) how to thrive by filling their bodies with energizing vitamins, nutrients, minerals, antioxidants and phytonutrients. Not a day goes by when someone doesn’t write me to say, “Thanks, I feel better too now.” Those letters from my readers are my digital cardinals.
The fact is, we need help and we need each other. We’re a nation riddled with preventable, lifestyle-driven diseases. We consume far too many animal products, processed and refined foods, saturated fats and empty calories. Industries that profit from both our ignorance and our misfortune spoon feed us confusion and deception. We’re taught to solely blame our luck-of-the-draw genes for our health issues, rather than our daily habits, dietary choices and interplay with the environment that surrounds us. The real truth lies somewhere in the middle and the good news is that we are more capable of turning around our global health crisis than we think.
Change your plate. Change your fate.
If you learn anything from my story, let it be this: Don’t wait. But I get it, change is a pesky notion. For many folks, the biggest challenge in changing their eating habits isn’t money, time or education, it’s reframing their connection between food and love. Love is healing. Love is comforting. Love is holy. Food can be all those things too. But as I mentioned, food can also be harmful. The goal isn’t to be restrictive or tight about what passes through the altar (your mouth) and into the temple (your body), it’s to create sustainable and consistent energy for every deserving cell in your body. That, my friends, is true love.
I dedicated my book, Crazy Sexy Kitchen: 150 Plant-Empowered Recipes to Ignite a Revolution, to Grandma. It’s my way of saying thank you for introducing me to the kitchen—the place that has become my pharmacy and transformed my life. I’m just sorry that I didn’t have the chance to share my decade-long health odyssey with her. I know that the knowledge in Crazy Sexy Kitchen would have improved her quality of life. I also know she would have gotten a real kick out of my friend Chef Chad Sarno, who helped me create the glorious recipes. If Grandma could sit at my dinner table today, perhaps she would have realized that you don’t have to compromise pleasurable cuisine for nourishment and good health—they actually go hand in hand.
Let’s do something together.
First, I want to ask you a few questions. How does the food you’re eating make you feel? Energized and happy or sluggish and guilty? Are you treating your body like a temple or a trash can? Sit with these questions for a few moments and then ask yourself this:
What’s one thing you could do to honor and love yourself at your next meal? Let me know in the comments below! No need to get overwhelmed by the idea of renovating your entire diet. Let’s just take a small step together and see how that feels.
Play in the kitchen. Light candles. Experience each bite. Take in the colors and smells. There are countless nourishing recipes right here at KrisCarr.com, or pick up your own copy of Crazy Sexy Kitchen.
Peace & cardinals,
Kris,
Thank you. I’ve known I have needed to change for a long time. I make steps but I always seem to falter. I’m hoping your post will push me over the edge to stay on the right path and not look back. You always make things seem some clear and easy. Thanks for your inspiration.
I needed this today. I have read a lot of books and a lot of blogs and seen a lot of movies about plant based diets. I know it’s true. I know it. I can’t make it happen in my life. And I was thinking this morning about how I need to face the fact that I’ve got more going on than just “not wanting to.” And I’ve been blaming it on not wanting to be rude to the people around me (wouldn’t want them to feel uncomfortable because of my food choices) and on the huge transitions my life has taken (recently married and 3 stepkids later).
I was also thinking this morning about how I think my motivation in the past to change my body or my food has been motivated by feelings of not being enough. And that doesn’t provide enough motivation to last very long. I need to find the self love to change how I treat my body.
Then I got to work and found this in my inbox. I still don’t really know how to fix it. But I feel lighter in my heart than I did 10 minutes ago. So thanks.
I just spent a week abusing my body with food and am slowly crawling back to good. I sit here reading your post while craving a Starbucks pumpkin scone, but instead I’ll nibble on an energy bar I made at home from the Terry Walters Clean Start book. I’ve enrolled in a Whole Food Kitchen course, and am digging out my copy of Crazy Sexy Diet, because I’m pretty sure my latest postherpetic neuralgia flare-up was caused by inflammation, plain and simple. I needed this post today, needed the reminders of self-love. Thank you so much for all you do!
My gram had a cardinal visit her backyard feeder every morning. She called him Petie. Thanks for stirring up a happy memory! < )
There used to be a time where my meals absolutely made me sluggish and tired. In college, I would experience some of the same things you did, spraying windex on food in the trash so I wasn’t tempted to continue bingeing on it (always something sugar filled) and then I would beat myself up in guilt over it for days after. Nowadays, I eat raw, vibrant foods and feel great after every meal. It’s hard to have guilt over large portions of vegetables and salads. Eating raw and green foods give me so much energy and the necessary large portions always make me feel energized; not sluggish.
On a different note, Kris, I noticed you said you are not in remission. Forgive me, I thought you were. Where are you standing in terms of your cancer right now? Thank you for sharing all you do. It is always an inspiration.
I’ve been following your lead in my own kitchen for many years. I was diagnosed with late stage cancer on the Valentine’s Day after your wonderful book Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips came out. Well, I am just fine and really, much better-than-fine now and I give a big nod to you and your work in that kitchen for that! Thank you for all you do. And thanks to your grandmother for being such an inspiring force for you! It goes to show you that even the “little” things we do can be so far reaching. They keep vibrating for many miles and many years. There she was in NY, doing her thing. And here I am, a little gal in Denver, enjoying health and happiness just because she lived the way she did.
We have many stories of special birds coming to my family members. Here’s my favorite. When my grandma was younger she was talking to her sister on the phone. It was a blustery February day. She heard a bird chirping loudly and wildly outside her kitchen window. When she peered out, there was a bright yellow canary! A canary, in Denver, in February! She started to tell her sister, who was apparently witnessing the same thing outside her own window. They later found out that it came around the same time that their mother, who was very ill, passed on.
Again, thank you Kris for being such an amazing leader. I know you hear from so many that you have inspired. For each one of those, there are likely hundreds quietly juicing and breathing their way to health because of you are such inspiring force.
Much love,
Sara
i joke about my addiction. “oh i just love ice cream.” or “i need my starbucks crack today.” “sugar is just my addiction of choice.” it would be funny. except it isn’t. it isn’t funny when i felt the cellulite through my pj’s this morning as i wonder what it is doing to my insides. it wasn’t funny when i was brushing my teeth last night and discovered how loose the skin on my face is. it isn’t funny when i look to sugar to fill some gaping hole inside that i cannot even figure out what it is. the hole just gets bigger. it isn’t funny when i tell myself how weak i am, what a loser i am, how i am going to get sick and die, every time i fall off the 21 day adventure cleanse wagon. it isn’t funny. it makes me sad.
love the site. love the idea of taking it one meal at a time. i am going to give it the ol’ college try.
🙂
Jen
I too love this site and the words go inspiration. I have struggled with addictions my whole life and have overcome so many except sugar. Sugar is killing me..I can’t seem to stop binging on sugar. I have tried everything. It can feel very hopeless at times. I am just trying to take it one day at a time right now but feeling a little overwhelmed. Thanks for your words!
Hi Megan,
I struggle with sugar too! Here’s what works for me.
Not eating at night after dinner (drinking lots of water and tea instead). I feel great in the morning when I give my digestion a long rest. Also–I try to focus less on deprivation and more on cooking awesome meals that are packed with nourishment. The more I fill up on greens and other veggies, the less I feel drawn to sugar. Lastly, when I take care of myself–exercise, get lots of sleep–the less I’m blue and the less I gravitate toward sweets.
Hope this helps.
Hang in there!
Corinne
DATES, GREEN TEA, CINNAMON STICKS TO THE RESCUE!
As a treat, I often indulge in pitted dates, oranges, and a few almonds. That often takes care of sugar cravings. Dates are super sweet and good for you! Another thing that works- cinnamon stick and clove tea (throw spices into boiling water and steep for a few minutes). Decaf Good Earth tea in the original flavor used to be what I tuned to. It tastes sweet without adding sugar.
Also, I’ve noticed when I drink green tea, I lose all desire for sugary anything. Green tea makes me crave something healthy if I’m hungry.
Oooo….another thing that makes me desire less sugar- a small piece of super high quality dark chocolate (at least 70% dark). One tiny square is all it takes. I let it begin to melt in my mouth before biting into it. I then close my eyes and savor the deliciousness. After eating this, I can’t even think of a cookie, pastry, or any other sugary something. I don’t even crave more chocolate!
Great story. I have a horrible problem with sugar cravings and the holidays are not my friend when it comes to trying to behave and eat properly. All I can suggest is that we all are looking for something and I will suggest this site for all of us sugar cravers to look at. I have just been introduced to F21 and are seeing and hearing amazing results from all types of people with all types of problems. Thank you for the amazing story and I look forward to follow more.
DATES, GREEN TEA, CINNAMON STICKS TO THE RESCUE!
As a treat, I often indulge in pitted dates, oranges, and a few almonds. That often takes care of sugar cravings. Dates are super sweet and good for you! Another thing that works- cinnamon stick and clove tea (throw spices into boiling water and steep for a few minutes). Decaf Good Earth tea in the original flavor used to be what I turned to. It tastes sweet without adding sugar.
Also, I’ve noticed when I drink green tea, I lose all desire for sugary anything. Green tea makes me crave something healthy if I’m hungry.
I love that your grandmother sends you cardinals. My father sends me hawks. Makes me know that he is still looking out for me.
Tonight, I am going to set the dining room table and actually sit at it while I eat a delicious vegan dinner. No sitting in front of the TV!
Claire
Kris,
I so needed to hear about the cardinals today, thank you. Real quick I began my Canser journey when our summer RV journey was so rudely derailed when I suffered a first ever brain seizure in August in CA, high tailed it back to AZ, we live in the most beautiful desert town along the Colorado River of Lake Havasu City, AZ but unless you really want to become a lab rat you don’t want to get ill, treated or tested there. So we went to the best which was also in Network on our Insurance, Barrow Neurological,. DX with Non-small Cell lung adencarcinoma Stage IV, with lymph node involvement and what they thought were Mets to the brain but they were scratching their heads because they didn’t look like canser mets but perhaps a virus, a parasite. REALLY? Yuck…..
So after a brain biopsy whereby getting ready to be discharged I suffered a 35 minute seizure and my doc acted fast and induced a medical coma to calm my brain down. 3 days worth where I was surrounded by angels of the ancestral variety. Yelling and screaming that I didn’t want to go with them to the light because my only child was going to have my first grandchild due 3 days after my 55th birthday in Feb, and I have to FIGHT….they assured me by what I call a comforting cloud like hug that I would see the baby. So yeah, your grandma is right there all the time.
Love you so much, you give me the persistence to keep on keeping on. I wish I had the ability to go to Pasadena in October, but due to who knows what kind of chemo schedule I have I think my calendar is a bit pre occupied.
I want to become a medical miracle and kick this crap out of me, I am Vegan, juice organic veggie juices 3 times a day and throw in a smoothie from your e-book which I bought pre DX. Life is a journey and the answers may or not be revealed. I’ll tell you what though, I believe in angels and miracles. So enjoy your day, and someday I will be able to attend one of your presentations.
Love, Hope
thanks for being so dang inspiring!!
Hey Kris, Couldn’t wait to read your blog today, you always seem to know exactly what to talk about and when!!!! My symbol bird for my Grandma who passed away 11 years ago is a blue jay, She always shows “herself” to let me know everything will be alright just when I need her, just like u do! Thank you for that. Many blessings, Denise
Blue Jays are the leaders of the pack for sure!
Thank you for sharing your (most recent) story with us. Your comment about Windex made me smile. It reminded me of the Sex and the City episode where Miranda squirts dish soap onto the brownies in her trash can because she can’t stop eating chocolate. I can relate to these actions as I have done the same thing. Your post is quite timely for me, as my husband and I decided to cut out processed sugar – starting today! I really hope to kick this nasty habit and benefit from the absence of the toxins that go into my body via unnecessary desserts and snacks.
Thank you for all that you do and share with your audience.
xo,
Rebecca
Chris I loved your story about the cardinals.
The day after my mum died of cancer, I was surrounded and circled by beautiful swallows while walking in a local park and I knew right away that they were a message from my mum.
Now when I walk in the same park and the swallows surround me, I feel at peace and know that the world is just as it needs to be.
Thanks for sharing your story about addiction to sugar as I am currently weaning myself off sugar too. Most days I do ok, but other days I go backwards. What comforts me is that I have more good days than bad ones now.
I’ve discovered that if you are trying to change a long term, automatically-ingrained-in-your-brain sort of habit, you have to give yourself time and change comes at a steady pace, one day at a time.
When I fall of the wagon (like yesterday at a birthday party for a dear friend :p ) I picked myself up and got straight back into a fresh food routine today which made me feel so much better physically that I know that I will happily be able to stick with my food plan for the rest of the week.
Thanks for your story and inspiration.
Sooo true. Steady pace and notice the swallows. 🙂
Kriss, cardinals are special to me too. Growing up, I remember seeing those beautiful red birds and thought how special they were. They looked so different than other birds in our yard! My dad told us that those beautiful birds were Santa’s Birds. If we saw one, that meant Santa was checking on us, and they would report back to Santa our good deeds (or bad!).
I lost my dad 2 years ago and miss him dearly. But whenever I see a cardinal, I know dad is around me in spirit, checking in on me..
Eileen. Your santa bird story is probably the best story ever. Thanks for sharing…
I loved your article!
I am glad that you overcame your sugar addiction!!!!!
Did you struggle to give up caffeine also?
I’ve fallen in love with life in a whole new way through cooking. I spent most of the weekend in the kitchen, cooking up recipes from Crazy Sexy Kitchen and feeding my friends and family. Sharing food creates memories–memories that are made even more priceless because they’re also filled with healthy food you can feel good about.
Even though the weekend was sort of uneventful, I’ll always remember it because of the time and care I put into taking care of myself and others through delicious, home-cooked meals. The time and effort that you put into cooking doesn’t feel like work when you realize how much joy and health you and your loved ones receive in return.
You are the empress of sacred food lifestyle. I love your new site, she is as shiny as you are. You have ancestors in the wild fairy world whispering you recipes for your sacred medicine you carry for this world. Yes a kitchen is an empire, the healing place for or soul wounds. Thank you for your bravery, warrior fairy.
Empress… Oooh, I like that. 🙂 xo
Beautifully said Durga!
This message is my story. I am grateful that I have not been diagnosed with cancer, however my life with my grandmom is similar to yours.
Everything I know about food, I learned from my grandmom. She was an awesome cook and food was her business.
She loved me with food. She has aslo taught me to love food more than divine health. She has loved herself into arthritis, diabetes, hypertension and a host of other things. I have decided that I love myself more than the food I thought I loved.
I will continue to change my plate so that my fate will not be that of my grandmom’s, but of a woman full of energy and life.
Thanks for sharing!
nakeia
Hi Kris Love your new site just as much as your old one.
Please keep sharing. We all need all the love you have to offer…
Warm regards
Doreen Schneider
Maple Ridge, BC
Canada
Wow … Cardinals are a symbol for me for my grandmother too. I saw one the day after I got married and knew it was a sign from her that she was with me … This has been significant through my life since she past away.