Kris Carr

Blog Post

How I kept my wings from wilting

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Hi Guys!

Welcome to my new kitchen! After a year of renovating, the farmette is nearly complete. Can I pinch myself now? I can’t believe we pulled this off! I’ve always dreamed of building a house from scratch, especially a kitchen. And I also can’t believe that my actual kitchen and my new book, Crazy Sexy Kitchen are wrapping at the same time. Big smile. Big gratitude.

This past year has been deliciously creative for both me and Brian. I’d write the book all day, he’d work on the house, and at night we’d come together and share our experiences. Though we’re not quite ready to move in (the kitchen is the only finished room!), we’re celebrating how close we are and how far we’ve come (personally and as a couple).

But let’s be real, I was nervous.

At times it felt like we had bitten off way more than we could chew. Days bled into nights and an indescribable tired seeped through our bones. If you’ve been through a major renovation at the same time as an enormous work project, you know exactly what I mean. At the height of it, I started to experience some adrenal issues. Naturally, when the stress materialized in my body, I wondered if we had made a bad decision, and I knew it was time to course correct.

Because I always write what I need to hear, I want to share a mantra that helped soothe the crazy.

“You are safe …”

Can you feel your shoulders relax when you read that? Mine do.

It took me awhile to zero in on that soul medicine. For a long time, I thought I had trust issues. I had a hard time trusting men, my career choices and ultimately, my intuition. I stepped gingerly through life for fear of the door in the floor that would suddenly open and suck me into a metaphoric basement. At their worst, my trust issues made me wickedly constipated (in all areas of life!) TMI? HA! Well I know I’m not alone because I’ve coached countless women who say they can only poop on their own safe and cozy throne. Sound familiar?

As time went on, I remember stepping back and watching my glorious self shrink and get really rigid. Then it dawned on me. The root of my stuff was less about trust and more about safety. And interestingly enough, my distress would often kick in at the precipice of any comfort zone expansion: a new publisher, relationship, job opportunity, health challenge and even more recently with the re-branding of all my websites! Talk about a major growth spurt!

Like me, you may be called to step up and flourish right now. Advice for us: Don’t let your wings wilt. Instead, get really sober about what’s safe and what’s not. Take one of those inner inventories we often talk about. Whether it’s in your mind or on paper, reflect on any drama or stories that might be pushing your fear factor. Once you do, you’ll probably realize that you’re more secure than you think and that the only one holding you back is lovely, well-meaning you. Look, sometimes it’s justified to be scared. But most of the time, creepy town is just an illusion, a silly place that gets amplified in our very clever minds.

In times like these, I like to turn to an affirmation. Here’s one I created for safety …

“I am safe and secure. I exhale any anxiety and inhale calm. As my world expands so do my heart and mind. I am willing to stay open and accept all the miracles and abundance the universe has to offer me.”

Take a few moments to really breathe that in. Notice how it makes you feel. Accept where you currently are (because it’s OK), and when you’re ready, release any residual tension holding you back.

I bring this up because lately I’ve been chatting and chewing about plant-empowered chow. Changing our diets can definitely poke buttons. Growing up, many of us learned that we regularly needed a hunk of beef and a glass of milk to ensure our health. Well, everything I’ve learned as a cancer thriver and wellness activist has proven the contrary. And yet, I always (I mean ALWAYS) get asked the same questions. “But, but, but, what about the protein, the calcium, the iron, what about the XYZ? Is this ‘safe?’” Eating this way is very safe. It may stretch your comfort zone at first, but in the end it just might be the healthiest decision you ever make for you and your family.

I hope this post resonates with you, whether it’s in the kitchen or in life. Leave a message in the comments below if it does. I’d love to meditate on YOUR musings!

Peace & sanctuary,

Add a comment
  1. Elizabeth says:

    I really was moved changed feeling calm and more feekings
    Thank you , its my first time reading you.
    Love

  2. Casey J says:

    I love you, Kris, and your writings! I had a rough early morning (the tactful way of saying I woke with a start in fear at 4am) and had worked through most of it, but I read your blog on 7 Ways to
    Work With Fear and then Don’t let Your Wings Wilt and I now feel even better. I love the exhale anxiety and inhale calm (a play on Exhale ego and Inhale God) and your I am Safe and Sound. Your writings are beautiful and so healing. You are amazing. Thank you for all you do. Namaste?

  3. Kirsten says:

    Thank you! That feeling of safety, of being safe, is a tough one for me, but I’m definitely making headway into actually believing that I am safe. It’s always great to receive new affirmations and simple understanding. Hugs

  4. WENDY SPEZOWKA says:

    Awesome article and your kitchen looks amazing ! Thanks for those amazing words especially those three, You are safe:) Funny how three simple words can mean so much and bring a person, me , to tears with out even contemplating them. Your affirmation will be kept close to my heart , its definitely something I need to hear over and over right now!! Hugs!!

  5. Jennifer says:

    This totally resonated with me. Thank you so much.

  6. Dea says:

    Hi Kris!

    You are lovely, I love you! Every time you write a new post on your blog, I can’t help but feel so happy and a big part of why has to do with the pictures you post of your new kitchen, the country side, your and the love of your life sitting on your front porch. They are so simple but filled with light, I love it! I’m a city girl but SO country at heart and I love seeing real pictures of a beautiful life like that. I know this is a long shot, but if you have more pictures, post them! Chances are some of them will end up on my dream board or mirror because I want that type of beautiful, simple, crazy happy country life in my future with the love of my life, family, my soulmate friends and all the happy animals 🙂

    Love,
    Dea

    • Casey J says:

      Well said, Dea! Actually beautifully stated! And, you helped me feel the depth of how I also have this desire… No soulful yearning, yet, analyze it away out of sheer ‘impracticality’. Oh my!! Thank you for helping me find this realization. Namaste?

  7. Kathrin Bucher says:

    You are a true inspiration!!!!!! Every time I am on your page (so beautiful) reading a blog post, watching a video or else sparks my joyous part within even more. So delicious and juicy:))))))
    Thank you, thank you so much!
    I can’t wait to find your two books in my post box (crazy sexy diet and creazy sexy kitchen) getting myself back to a healthier & happier life.

    Can’t wait for your next post.

    Much love,
    Kathrin

  8. Lupe says:

    I am excited to find what I’ve been looking for… that something that’s been missing, that I knew was out there, that I just needed to find it, or rather find you. A real person who can teach from the heart what I need to learn about real food, super healthy changes that need to happen. I’m 55 years old and happy to be here today. Life is great! Thanks

  9. Lupe says:

    I am excited to find what I’ve been looking for… that something that’s been missing, that I knew was out there, that I just needed to find it, or rather find you. A real person who can teach from the heart was I need to learn about real food, super healthy changes that need to happen. I’m 55 years old and happy to be here today. Life is great! Thanks

  10. Genevieve says:

    Hi Kris, I really like your affirmation. My shoulders dropped about 3 inches when I read it! I easily stress myself out–worrying about what has already happened or feeling anxious about what could happen (health-wise, at work, with my baby girl…) I’ve been trying to catch myself in those moments and ask “Are you (or is she, or is it) ok right now?” And the answer is almost always yes! I’m going to try adding your affirmation as well. <3

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