Breathe

I thought I could have it all, but now …

September 7, 2012|87Comments|


Hi again, Friend,

Last week I shared that cha-cha-change is coming. If you missed it, you can review all the juicy details here. In short, after much consideration I’ve decided to fold all my existing web worlds into one new site, KrisCarr.com — launching on September 17th!

This week I want to go deeper into the “why.” It started a month or so after the majority of my new year’s resolutions flopped. To say they were lofty is a gross (and sticky) understatement. I basically put a superhuman shifting schedule on my 2012 agenda. But there was one idea that stuck with me and interestingly, it became my guiding light. “What energetic through line or emotional thread do you want to feel throughout the year?” The answer came months later. Here it is: calm.

I used to believe I could have it all. I just couldn’t have it all at once. I don’t want to believe that anymore, because I now feel like “all” is just too much (for me). Spaciousness is far more nourishing than “all.” Spaciousness is my soul’s currency. It’s the place where all art is born. “All” is cumbersome.

Lately I’ve been daydreaming a lot. I daydream while I hike my mountains. I daydream in the car, train or plane. I daydream in my journal. I cut out images and post them on my life board: a hybrid between an art director’s style board and a spiritual seeker’s vision board. When I take a few steps back and squint at the words and pictures on the board, they ignite a visceral response in me.

Here’s what I see: work smarter not harder, relish emptiness, be quiet then play, hunt for treasures (especially at flea markets), cook, connect, nurture your home, embrace the introversion/extroversion balance, relax, trust authenticity, let graciousness and gratitude lead the way, know there is safety in vulnerability and only create what you want to create on your own terms. Oh, and don’t be afraid of color, especially paint color, and–dare I say–wallpaper.

So as you can see, the “why” behind powering down Crazysexylife.com is intricately connected to the energy I desire for my own life.

Now to you: Are there any seemingly difficult changes in your near future? Has a project or relationship run its course – even if it’s still fertile and bright? Do share.

Or perhaps you’d rather share this: How do you want to feel in the next five years? Does your life board match your current work/life load? If not, what’s one step you could take to slowly, gently, graciously recalibrate?

Peace & alignment,

Kris Carr



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87 responses to I thought I could have it all, but now …
  1. You are such an inspiration. Keep following your heart, and we will all support you!

    • Hi Kris,

      I’m so proud of your decision. It’s healthy and smart to want for “calm” to be the guiding light in your life this year. I guess I’m on the exact same page as you. On January 1st of this year, I declared that this was going to be the year of “me.” The year I kick it into fast forward and accomplish the 99 things that have been on the back burner for so long. And then my 2 year-old was diagnosed with Autism. Well… (deep breath)…you can guess how priorities shifted in a heartbeat. And how the following emotions -fear, anger, grief, hope, and an overwhelming unconditional love – shook me to the core. So,calm? Hell yeah, does that word resonate with me. Its what I strive for each and every day. Thanks so much Kris for being such a shining, courageous ray of light. And for being so human at the same time.

      Peace and love to you,
      Carla

  2. Great post…I thought I could have it and do it all. Again, my MS has reared it’s ugly head reminding me that I need to slow down and stop trying to be all that to all people. So I guess it’s head isn’t all that ugly, it’s just a reminder of what kind of life I really want and really need. Slowing my roll and listening to what the “quiet” is telling me. I too, need and want to nurture my body and my home. I feel very calm yet very excited when I daydream about it. In 5 years I see myself in a more relaxed state, feeling safe and serene in my home. Well, my son will the 17 and driving, eeek….so I will need to practice self care now! LOL! Going to our local Green Food Fest this evening, a great start to a great weekend…..

  3. Interestingly enough, at this point in my life, when someone asks me what i want from life, my answer is also peace. I want my world to be peaceful and calm. This time in my life is now about me and what i need, not what the world (family, friends, co workers, local organizations) want from me. I get into a rut of wanting to be and do everything, but I am not super woman, I am just me and that is who i am looking for. Good luck.

  4. I am doing my student teaching this semester, and am so fortunate to be working with a mentor teacher who strives to create just such an environment for students each day. I find a marked difference between this classroom and all others I’ve ever been in. Things move much more slowly in here; we are slowing down often to listen to kids’ questions, and delve into rich discussion about the things that piqué their interest–not just rushing off into the next thing and being a slave to the schedule. you have to be a rebel to achieve this sometimes, because the world wants to fling you into next Tuesday before you even hit the weekend. But in our classroom, we take “moments of silence” throughout the day: a full 60 seconds of rest and clearing our minds. The kids were confused by this at first because they are used to silence being used as punishment. My mentor teaches them that silence is a gift. It is a peaceful place to be a kid.

  5. Wonderful! I love the energy in this piece. Yes, that’s what I want for my life too. ‘All’ is too much.

  6. Whew! Amen sister!

    Glad I am not the only one who set forth superhuman NY resolutions! Spent the summer beating myself up over timing, toiling over what to do first and how to devote energy to all the different buckets….all the while ping ponging back and forth between complete trust and communion with the universe and lectures rom the Cruella Deville in my mind.

    Peace and calm are all we need to bring peace to ourselves and others. Thank you for reminding me we are all one and never alone….

    Beautiful days and much love to all. And thank you Kris, as always, for baring your soul.

  7. oooohhhh, I so feel this too. at the beginning of 2012, I had 6 businesses, 2 homes, a solo Mom to a spirited 7 yr old, and other passionate pursuits outside of business. I loved each separate (or most), but when added all to together, well…the “ALL” become TOO MUCH, really a living hell. I felt busy (not creative or productive), rushed, overwhelmed, exhausted, stressed…. unhappy.

    A card on my board reads “Simplify Life, Magnify Living”…. that is my thread for this year. I sold 3 of those businesses in June. Next up is the second home.

    Less is more….Less is more… Less “things” more life, living, loving, creating…

    Great post Kris! Love how authentic you are! xo

  8. I love your inspirational nudge to think about life and where we want to steer it. It’s easy to stay on a route that doesn’t fulfill us and sometimes when someone asks the pertinent question we have to sit up, think and ultimately change our course. Thanks

  9. Thanks for the reminder that trying to have it all – regardless of when and how – isn’t necessarily all it’s cracked up to be. I needed that!

  10. There’s such an authentic energy in this post. Thank you for all that you radiate into the world. xo

  11. Good on ya, darlin’. Breaking away from cultural norms and carving out the world WE want for OURSELVES is never easy.. Congratulations for taking out the “NO” stick and swinging hard. Enjoy the calm. You deserve it.

  12. Thx, Kris for all of your enthusiasm for life and it’s ups and downs. Your thoughts never cease to amaze me, support me and encourage me to move on, let go and just BREATHE!
    Hugs, Y

  13. You could retreat into the woods forever and the world would never forget what an inspiration you are, Kris. I love that you recognize the need to simplify your life. We all get caught up in too much “doing” and not enough “being”. It is your authenticity that is so nurturing for your readers. Thank you for that!

  14. Love this, thank you! It’s a beautiful reminder for me, too (listen up, self!).

    The real “all” is in the spaciousness itself. Spaciousness lets us see and feel the natural all-together oneness, which is infinite and unbounded, and allows us to let go of the me-me-me illusory “having it all,” which is really so limited and tiny.

    Yay for you for finding that naturally and allowing your truth to shine.

  15. I too bite off way more than most could chew- Mom to 2 busy boys, wife, Mom to 2 crazy pups, daughter, work full time- small business owner, school PTC board member: fundraiser chair, yearbook co-chair, 6th grade committee, room parent…PHEW- plus I have a wonderful group of supportive and loving friends and a couple drainers too! Oh and did I mention that I am half way through my chemo regimen…I am a person that has a hard time saying NO- but I know I thrive on it- I want it ALL- I love to do it ALL. (except clean the house)
    Where do I want to be in 5 years? Well all the school stuff will be over after this year. I want to have a vegetable garden and concentrate on cooking and eating well. After I started reading your books and changed my diet I realized how good I CAN Feel! If I can influence my kids to eat well and enjoy AND celebrate who they are- And do it all with humor, and a full heart. And in 5 years I hope to be cancer free and looking back on this bump on my road with a new set of perky ones. Kris-Love your vitality and twinkle

  16. Needed this today! I have been feeling like a tree with many branches and not one is strong enough for a swing. Kris, you have, over the years created a forum for so much great information and yet it may have diluted the main thing so many of come here to read…YOU!!!
    I am looking forward to being saturated by a focused, beautiful and balanced Kris!!!

  17. It’s a great reminder that life is not about ”ALL” but those few moments where we take the time to stop and relax. For me I tried being a Super woman and it was tearing me appart. So now the focus in on quality time with my boyfriend and our daughter. ‘ALL” the other stuff is not so important anymore. You are awsome at making us realise to stop and focus on what really matters. Thanks for that

  18. Thanks Kris!! I hope you find the peace and new surge of energy that comes with :)

    My life is in a state of flux right now, trying to choose between undertaking another course in yoga teaching, or plunging into studying physical therapy at university! 4 year course and I’ll be 27 when I start, so not a decision I want to take lightly.

    Also dealing with the fact that my husband recently underwent life saving surgery and we now know he has severe Crohns Disease, all in all, it has been a strange couple of months!!

    I’m seeking peace too, peace and then enthusiasm, and LOVE over all! xx

  19. Tears of joys…Humph, wasn’t expecting that! Thank you for your comments. xo

  20. So happy for you. I believe the shift is happening for many. I too am making the leap for more presence of mind. Giving my notice at a stressful position I have held for 12 years has been emotional. I will miss the people I work with and the guests I have taken care of. But, those relationships that are important will survive and I will have more time to redefine my life with relationship to my true goals and values. I start a “Women in Transition ” class today. Thank you for your encouragement and raw introspect.

  21. I’m so excited to find out what we’ll hear from you next, and to see your new website. I can relate to the want of spaciousness…good for you, for going right ahead and taking it!

  22. In the next five years I a thriving laptop business that gives me the freedom to work from anywhere and allows me to play out my gifts and passions. I am on the path to do that and its inpiring people like you that help me get there.

  23. I simply love you to bits Kris Carr, you are my guiding light and inspiration!!

  24. Ha ing it all is a huge burden. Lovely post. Peace?

  25. WOW!!! Thank you, thank you, thank you!! I’m writing this with tears streaming down my face as I BREATHE….. I pray you will have the CALM and PEACE that God wants for you, as I praise him for having brought you into my life via the internet. He has used you as a beacon of HOPE and a messenger of LOVE and ACCEPTANCE so many times just when I needed it, sometimes not even realizing what I needed. BLESSINGS today and always!!! You’re awesome!

  26. I am inspired! I have just deeply looked into my inner self and asked myself what my true self is in these past 8 days. I have been non-stopping to develop my money coaching business and ignored my passion, pottery (I am also a professional potter). I feel empty and my heart is not aligned. I just made a decision to bring pottery back to my life and offer private pottery classes for women at my home studio. It’s so important to check our inner self from time to time!

  27. Carpe Diem Kris! You never cease to inspire and amaze me! Thank you for all your wonderful posts. You’ve changed my life ( and my kids and my friends) and will forever be grateful for all your sharing. You have our support always!
    Peace:-)

  28. This is my “puppy in a pen” post that I’m so glad I clicked on this morning. It reminds me that sometimes I need to put the distractions away, whether they are a puppy, large project with a looming deadline or even some wonderful idea that is dominating my time more than it should, and just breathe and be.

    That, ultimately, is where happiness and peace can be found. I’m harkening back to a fortune cookie note that I carried in my wallet for so long it eventually turned to dust which said “stop searching forever, happiness is right next to you.”

  29. Know you are loved by all of us Kris….and if we do not acknowledge each and every communication you expedite to us, please forgive us and continue to know you are loved by all. OM :-)

  30. LOVE this post. I am printing it to read every time I feel I need to “take on one more thing” which is a daily thought.
    Peace Kris

  31. Kris…I loved this. You bring up such an interesting point, and I can certainly relate in my own journey. On this crazy, sexy, miraculous journey we are all on, it can be so easy to get overwhelmed. Have you juiced today? Vision boarded? Affirmed? Meditated? Prayed? Yoga? The list is endless. Sometimes we just need to relax and remember why we’re doing all of this in the first place. The reason is NOT to have one more thing to add on our already crazy-long to-do list!! IT’S FOR MORE PEACE AND JOY! Phew… So, yes: somedays that means juicing and vision boarding if that sings to my soul that day. But you know what? Somedays it’s watching crappy reality T.V.! Balance, baby. Balance. Keep shining, and thank you for always opening up the dialogue about things that really matter. XO

  32. Kris Carr great stuff here , “Work smarter not harder, relish emptiness, be quiet then play, hunt for treasures (especially at flea markets), cook, connect, nurture your home, embrace the introversion/extroversion balance, relax, trust authenticity, let graciousness and gratitude lead the way, know there is safety in vulnerability and only create what you want to create on your own terms.”

  33. Fantastic and beautiful synchronicity abounds. It seems from your lovely and honest blog post and the resulting comments that there is a groundswell of us modern women re-defining what “having it all” means.

    I too, making major shifts to create spaciousness in my life. In June all career aspects were thriving and growing: music therapy, music education, writing, and yoga therapy abounded in blissful bounty. Then, WHAM. I got my universal smack down in the form of a severely disabled client who became agitated and punched me the jaw. Whiplash, migraines, sprained jaw….yup….pain was my lesson to stop and slow down.

    I’ve spent my summer going deep into myself, crawled into my own chrysalis of healing love and meditation yoga bliss. Now, as I am 6 weeks away from a partial return to work, I have the gift to choose what to do, and I intend to choose wisely. My dharma is to teach; to help others learn to shine through their difficulties using the tools of yoga. Simple.

    Bless your journey, and thank you for sharing you and your thoughts. I’m glad to see more of you.

    All love,
    Gita

  34. I love this post because it is causing me to rethink my perspective. Unlike most spiritual people I run into, I don’t have a business of my own, a significant other or children. I work a regular job Monday thru Friday. I have a little blog that I have not because I want a ton of people to read it but I just enjoy writing. I’m just trying to do my best. If anything I feel I don’t do enough but perhaps I am viewing it all wrong. Perhaps I should view my life as having just the right sense of calm which is true, my life is very peaceful for the most part. Instead of trying to fill it with this, that and the other perhaps my life really is enough just as it is. Thanks, you have given me a lot of food for thought.

  35. Love this Kris!! Just said this to my good friend yesterday that I want to feel calm and have fun. Must be in the air… xo :)

  36. Just because you CAN doesn’t mean you SHOULD. Props to you for knowing the difference. XO

  37. Just within the last week, I have been thinking about how to create more SPACIOUSNESS in my life. The happy coincidence that you have written about that very word is thrilling!! There just isn’t a better word for that air we want to put between our tasks and commitments, to breathe and remember to have some fun. Congratulations on all you great changes!

  38. Kris i love love your words of wisdom & inspiration… i can picture where i want to be in 5 years time & i’m putting those posotive energy out there. i’m huge believer that everything turns out right in the end, dreams do come true at the right time! Just gotta breath & be paitent!! I’ve had the most hectice & toughest year of my life & i’m about to leave where i am and go off into the bush in Zambia for a few months & i’m really going to try and get into yoga, breathing, self care & spend time in nature! Will miss reading your words of inspiration good one to go off with though!! Thank you.

  39. Kris, welcome to my world :)…it’s beautiful, serene and nourishing here… you just articulated my life much better than I ever could have. This can be the happiest place of all, stepping back and letting others be the ‘amazing’ nonstop doers….you’ve been there done that. Sounds like you may be having a soul level transformation – mature soul to old soul (google old soul). ;) We’re actually the same age–I’m also in a major nesting phase and expressing my inner joy and liberation thru paint (and possibly grass cloth). ;) Thanks for all you do. xxo

  40. Kris, thanks for this inspiring post — what I needed to read today.

  41. Kudos Kris! Long ago I had a boyfriend, who among other things came into my life to teach me that less is more. Now for me, *all* means being in the moment with what is. Thank you for sharing your process and vulnerbility. I am practicing more openness with mistakes and changes. To that end I just painted my apartment with COLOR! Nourishing greens! And when one wall came out just wrong, I admitted my mistake and hubby and I *changed it*!

  42. The next 5 years, my goal is simple. I want to feel inspired and be inspiring. Of course accomplishing the goal isn’t quite as simple as stating it, but I’ve got some ideas I’m really excited about percolating in my head and heart.

    Kris, I wish you all sorts of good things with the changes coming for you. Seem like they are coming from a healthy, heartfelt, wise place, and that’s all good. :)

  43. In our world, where more is (supposed to be) more it is so refreshing to see someone dial it back and say No, less is actually more. Keep daydreaming and nurturing and soaking up the calm! Much love to you.

  44. I’m anxiously waiting for your new web page. Nothing seems to amaze me about you, Kris, anymore. Keep on keeping on, young lady. Believe me, we all benifit and are so uplifted. Again, thanks for being you.

  45. you are dialed in girl – i feel the same way – i have felt pressure within myself to be more, do more and visited a friend recently and had the best time just sitting and hanging out and helping her get organized – my soul wants to nourish the relationships in my life, it wants calm too and to slow down and enjoy life. thank you for posting this – i love your stuff and your bright light it makes me shine mine brighter too. xoxoxoxo – tara

  46. Spaciousness – I love that. I, too, require quiet and space to breathe and settle into myself. And giving love to your home is always good for the soul. :)

  47. thank you Kris, it is very inspiring.

  48. A very timely post. We all need the calm spaciousness. Just the words invoke wonder!

  49. I love all the positive comments here! However, I feel rotten and depressed! I have two wonderful little girls and no time for quite or spaciousness in my life. I don’t know where to start. . . I love to eat healthy but finances make it difficult. I want to do more but feel that I cannot right now. I will try to look within myself today and show more love and positive thoughts to my girls. Thank you.

  50. Oh Girl, you did it again. you wrote the words of my heart’s yearning. i want peace, friendships, happy kids, a mellow home. i can”t have all of that and create all my brilliant ideas too. You enjoy your life Kris. I adored you when you had a tiny little site. I adored you when you were a big and famous author. But I adore you more now that you are taking back your life, peace and true self and hanging out with your hubby on the farm. You created the revolution, but don’t give up your own evolution!!!!!

    love
    Mia

  51. Kris: Please keep your posts up. They are enlightening and very inspirational. I have very severe health problems and they give me a very positive spin on the importance life and what really should be our legacy to others.

  52. I remember a very wise woman telling me that to pick something of value it is usually necessary to unpick something else to make room…or time…and often what we have to unpick seems good too. So I have found that if I am greedy and don’t unpick the one for the love of the other…they both lose value. many times in my life I find choices are more like good, better and best instead of “good” or “bad”. We really can’t have it all. But we CAN take some lovely sips and out of all the lovely flavors we pick one or two ..and totally enjoy :). Thank you for inspiration. You matter so much and make such difference:)

  53. I believe many of us women struggle with this overload of stuff in our lives. It’s a combination of our ADD society overwhelmed by too many options, and our need to be better than the next person (even if that person is ourselves).
    I’ve recently realized that feminism has won, and women are now more powerful than men in many arenas. Many more women are graduating college and getting higher paying jobs than men (albeit more men are at the top top), women leave home sooner than men their same age who still live at home with their parents, more men are staying home while women are breadwinners of the family, and women are more aggressive in the dating scene and call the shots (gone are the days of Sean Connery’s James Bond world). Of course, there are still a lack of women in the math, science, and technology industtry;and I am in no way shape or form demeaning staying at home (as I had stayed at home for 8 years with my children and quite frankly want to go back to that life of leisure). With this shift in society over the last few decades, I think women need to find their thread and stick with it. I will definitely keep this post in mind, Kris. Thank you for being an inspiration.

  54. Oh wow! I didn’t see last week’s post (sorry), but this sounds pretty serious. Sending you healing. Wishing you strength and success in whatever it is that you need to do at this time.

  55. SO interesting that you posted this today! I have been smacked upside the everything by perimenopause. WHO KNEW all there was to this incredibly misunderstood time in woman’s life?? I’ve been educating myself like a fiend and SLOWING DOWN. Turning in my card for almost everything and taking things at a snail’s pace. LOVING it and feeling VERY sane and wise about it. Im a doer as well. I love to DO. But, my body, apparently, has other ideas and I’m glad it does or I might still be running at breakneck speed.

    I HIGHLY recommend any women out there in the late 30s range + to GET educated NOW about perimenopause. There is cutting edge, mind/body stuff out there but you’ve GOT to find it for yourself because your regular doctor, male or female, will probably not know a THING about it.

    Tome.

    Sorry.

    Good for you Kris…we’re with ya!

  56. SPACIOUS~NESS
    STILL~ NESS
    Woman…
    Womb -man.
    The Divine in us is like the the place where all things are created.
    It is like the womb…fertile… receptive to life, nourishing and selflessly loving.
    Our female bodies reflect that space and that stillness. Wow.
    The more we are empty, the more we are the vessel.
    I know that there have been cultures where women …and their tribes.. knew this truth.
    I am glad you are a voice for those searching….
    Yes the ..”having it all”… has been such a trap…
    It is like a mirage that keeps us from seeing what is really there, what is important ,
    and who we are in our essence.
    Thank you for sharing your path.
    Love to All who are reading this…
    Sophia~pati

  57. I so want this as well. I got very ill from over-working, over-committing and under-asking for help (and under re-asking when I was brave enough to ask at all). I let myself get sucked in to pleasing others over taking care of myself. I got confused about what was selfish and what was right (to someone else). I did not know because in my corporate environment it’s very hard to see where you begin and the company ends. Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries will be a very important through line for me. I get sucked back because I deeply fear failure, judgment and rejection (not fitting in to my company’s go go go culture). When I took the time off to heal, I was feeling connected, I was healing, I was becoming happy. I was letting go of the shame, guilt, fear that was pervasive. But as soon as people started peering in – and they started to judge – it all fell apart. I was so scared of their judgment and I second-guessed myself. I lose it and I gain it back on a daily/weekly basis. This self-love and spaciousness turns into fear and shame. I will keep trying. You inspire me. This quote helps me – “We think that the point is to pass the test or overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don’t really get solved. They come together and they fall apart. Then they come together again and fall apart again. It’s just like that. The healing comes from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy.” – Pema Chodron I really hate that things don’t really get solved. But it gives me spaciousness to know I don’t have to solve all the problems. When one is solved, another appears.

  58. I have to agree with Mia. Follow that throughline Kris. I’ve been an up until now, quiet male “lurker,” nourishing my own body and soul aspirations vicariously through Kris’s uniquely vibrant, genuinely compassionate, and humbly honest efforts toward health and wakefulness in life and words. And I must say, as just one random, ordinary, anonymous reader, I’ve been moved–immeasurably. My bout with cancer in ’09 would’ve been much less positive, energetically speaking, if not for finding CrazySexyCancer. The tears now come as I write this, all gratitude, for the lovely and lively Kris Carr. Thank you.

  59. Your words touch my heart (again). I’m in a rough spot with all aspects of my life, so thanks for the inspiration.

  60. I remember seeing your documentary a couple years ago, and it resonated so deeply in me, that it crossed my mind to look you up, all this time later. Your strength and passion for life ignited a fire in me, and quelched a few as well. A very poignant reminder to cherish the things that matter to me…..really matter….and stop caring so much about the things that don’t. Your light has radiated right into me, and left me forever changed. Thank you.
    Kerry C.
    Laguna Niguel, California

  61. Hi Kris, I felt my whole body relaxed as I read your words…so refreshing to hear the respect for spacioussness in your life articulated so well. I was relieved because I am so over the constant push out there to “have this all” and as I have listened and dropped back I have been challenged my doubts and judgements…inner and outer. Good luck with embracing your beautiful authentic life and thankyou for shining on us. :)
    Joy (Adelaide, Australia)

  62. The most important things to remember are the simplest things. It always helps to be reminded to see the simplicity. Remember the simplicity because it is there that we find peace .

  63. I’m a middle school art teacher who has been given the opportunity to make art with my students to decorate a brand new facility for post-partum mothers in recovery…. Recovery from: a hard life, abuse, mental illness, addiction, substance abuse… Pretty heavy stuff, but very real! Any suggestions?

  64. Wow, calm, just what I am seeking. My goal, stay as healthy as I can, and as positive with that crzy lung cancer diagnosis, quit my job. move to a quiet house in the desert, be a grandmom and just breathe. Breathe, life, calm, peace, peace, peace. Surround myself with those I love, those who love me, and breathe………love you Kris, such an inspiration.

  65. I love this line you wrote: Let graciousness and gratitude lead the way.

    Yes!

    Although I still consider myself to be a wellness warrior, there was a stage where my focus was only on that. And that is when I discovered you. You were my inspiration: my role model.

    Treatment ended. I got swept back into the world of doing and accomplishing. I have been noticing a harshness in me lately. I forgot what I discovered durning in the Wellness Warrior stages – Focus on appreciation. That steadfast focus brought me peace – ease – and often joy, despite what was happening to my body.

    I forgot.

    Today you reminded me again. Thank you.
    Namaste -

  66. thanks again for your inspiration and beautiful life that you share with us. please don’t feel bad about setting really lofty goals. if you set your sights too low, what is there accomplished? go for BIG! dream big, live big – all within reason of course and if you don’t hit the highest mark you’ve set, don’t beat yourself up. you’ll still have accomplished much. more than if you settled for less. we know you don’t settle for less!

    you’re a true treasure. keep it up crazy, sexy Kris!

    peace,
    james

  67. Thank you, Kris for affirming something I’ve thought for a long time. I’m glad you have decided to make SPACE for you! I have always believed that you SHOULDN’T have it all. If you have it all what is there left to dream of? I remember when cruises were something you did when you retired. It was something you worked for, saved for, dreamed of. I remember when limos were something rich people rode in, not the “right” of every teenager attending a prom. Our media and the star mentality have spoiled us into thinking we have to have everything. I believe that is totally unhealthy. Good for you for slowing down, connecting with nature and breathing in LIFE.

  68. Kris, Thanks for always sharing your true self. I’ve been thinking about success a lot lately — what we are told it should be and creating my own definition. Like you time to do things other than work is a big part of what is bubbling below the surface for me. Congratulations on defining what success means to you and making it happen. I think I need to create a life board of myself. Love the idea!

  69. Kris, you have been the wise little sister I never had….I hear your voice so often during my day..talking about green juice….focusing on what is important..taking time to breathe…inspiring me every step of the way..I recently was diagnosed with breast cancer and your upbeat, cute and irreverant attitude has kept me going through all of it..I’ve made it through my treatment and now I’m ready to take on the world!! A life board is a great idea!! Love you!

  70. EMPTINESS…
    a Buddhist word that does not translate well…
    and here you are…
    getting us to listen.
    We live in a culture where … “having it ALL”
    is ingrained in us to the point that
    the more we have… the less we feel we have …
    ENOUGH….never enough….
    To let go of the cultural desire for ….
    “ALL”
    is much more of a leap than we…
    “think”
    it is.
    You are asking us to go beyond our conditioned…” thinking”
    As I continue to ponder your writing
    I am letting myself stop my mind reactions to your words…
    and simply
    BE
    with the concept.
    Yes…I wrote the other day…
    and I am still letting the death of what you are inviting us to be sink in.
    “all”
    includes:
    Who I try to make myself be…
    How I want others to see me…
    How I have need to see myself….
    How lovely it would be to go into the quiet wilderness…
    or a temple…
    and simply
    STOP…
    Until the “all” that I have been told is so very important…
    falls away.
    your word have become a place of meditation for me…
    Thank you

  71. I used to wonder why I wasn’t being led to a larger life, why my voice is so quiet and it feels right to be this way…and one day when I was meditating, I heard the words of my inner self say “You are here to smile at everyone you meet” I was surprised at such a simple instruction but sure enough, this smiling journey has been beyond anything I could have dreamed up for myself. It will most likely go undocumented but I am here to say that smiling at the world is enough. Miracles abound. Endless love for your next chapter Kris xxxxx

  72. So much of this resonates with me, especially, “know there is safety in vulnerability” WOW! What? Let me let that sink in for a moment. I know somewhere down deep I believe this to be true and once I embrace it, peace will be so much more accesible, but my control-freak alter-ego doesn’t want to hear it. Hmmm.

    Earlier this year I found myself balanced precariously at the top of a metaphorical roller-coaster track, and not knowing what else to do, I sat down in the cart and threw my hands in the air. I have been riding that coaster ever since, and living the rapid climbs and terrifying plunges, completely out of control of where I’m going. I do feel vulnerable, and I want to feel safe. So I’ll sit in that thought for a while and hope it sinks in.

    Thanks for sharing your continued wisdom, and every good wish to you as you strive for calm. You deserve it!!

  73. “…let graciousness and gratitude lead the way, know there is safety in vulnerability and only create what you want to create on your own terms.”

    This really resonates with me right now. Kris has taught me to lead with love. If you stick to that mindset, things just work out. KrisCarr.com is going to be led with love–straight from KC to all her readers.

    There’s so much goodness to come and I can’t wait to watch its beauty unfold.

  74. On a slightly different note….I have a recurrence of Ovarian cancer. I opted out of chemo after seven months and no remission. I have been doing homeopathic nd green drinks for the past four months. Here is my question to you Kris. HOW do you getting all your green drinks in? I would like to do four a day, I am lucky to get in two. There is a juice place that makes great green drinks and my husband brings me two a day. But we go to a mountain retreat every weekend ( my healing house) and I can’t make it past one a day? I know these are important to my healing. How many a day do you do? And what is the secret? Many thanks. Cindy

  75. That Enjoli commercial (“I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan”) is sooo 1980. Just because we can, doesn’t mean we should. Thank you for once again shedding light on a sane path.
    xo

  76. Hi Kris,

    I have really enjoyed your blog and books, but this awesome post prompted my first ever comment. I have been so “there” with you thinking I could have it all, but just not all at once, and now I am SO “here“ with you in the nourishing spaciousness. How did we get so lucky? :)

    I teach meditation, emotional awareness and creative expression to kids (translation: I create a space for them “to be” and we play) Number one on my 2012 New Year’s list was “Expand my business.” But in needing to be present and grounded in order to allow the “being” magic with the children, I have found that giving up my agendas and striving were actually more in order this year than creating an empire. Your inspiration has supported me in giving myself permission to keep things at a level where I can maintain a loving source connection: regular workshops with kids, some privates and dive into some writing time this fall and… space for something new to arise.

    I think Rumi says is beautifully:

    How could we know what an open field of sunlight is? Don’t
    insist on going where you think you want to go. Ask the way to the spring. Your
    living pieces will form a harmony.

    Lots of love and appreciation for your honesty and discoveries Kris!
    see you in the s p a c e this fall!

  77. r monetary success. My husband and I were very driven in bu less is more. There is a trade off for monetary success. My husband and I were very driven in business and when we were not working we,,were focused on obtaining all the accoutrements of success. When my husband had emergency open heart surgery it was like being hit by a mack truck. I realized that heart disease was a food born illness and we had leaned our sucess ladder against the wrong wall. We leaned hard into simple kitchen abuhndance! We embraced an a oil free plant based diet and watched the miracles unfold!! Our time together is so precious nd ur focus is health not wealth. I can so relate to how addictive and obsessive and alluring success can be but it comes with a heavy price. I encourage you to follow your heart and listen to your inner voice to play house with your hubby:-)

  78. I said to my soul, be still, and wait without hope
    For hope would be hope for the wrong thing; wait without love
    For love would be love of the wrong thing; there is yet faith
    But the faith and the love and the hope are all in the waiting.
    Wait without thought, for you are not ready for thought:
    So the darkness shall be the light, and the stillness the dancing.

    ~ T.S. Eliot ~

    (The Four Quartets)

  79. OMG!!!!!!!!! How wonderful that u wrote about something we all truly need and long for and should be striving for!! Before u told us of your feelings I have thought of nothing else of late. Simplify, loose all the noise in my brain,house and life and concentrate on what is truly important and what makes us happy. Life is way too short!! My hats off to u once again Kris for getting it right and inspiring us all!!!!!????

  80. WAHEY! I’ve been juicing for 2 months now after reading the book a year ago. It took that long and much prompting to just dive in! I’m still beautifully imperfect at it but I am loving the journey. I too need S P A C E from being superhuman. I dream of giving it all up and pursuing healing work when I read all of these rad comments. Can’t wait to see you at your new site, at your own pace! You rock x

  81. I am so inspired by your response to your life’s nudgings and impulses. I too started an online venture this season and have recently felt overwhelmed with the maintenance and upkeep of it. I wanted to create a creative community of conscious artists and provide life coaching services. My desire to do just this is strong; it’s how I do it that is going to change. I want to cultivate community organically, just as you have done Kris for us. This way is physically and mentally less taxing on the body and allows space for renewal. Then, I can really be present for my clients and for myself. Best to you Kris! I’ll be reading and watching. ;)

  82. Thank you for saying this out loud. As a woman of today, and being the daughter of a Feminism generation mother, I have been force feed the idea that as a modern women “we CAN have it all”. What is we don’t WANT it ALL!! I have found that I am really OK with having just what I need. I am now a mother to a young girl and want to teach her that you don’t need it ALL because this makes life cluttered and sometimes overwhelming. I wish that I did not have to become sick with RA to learn to slow down and smell the roses while I was collecting the world in my pocket. Thank you for being such a light that we can all stop and enjoy when needed.

  83. I love your post – thank you.
    I also adore your new site.

    I am getting ready to move from The Bay Area (quitting my awesome job) to middle of know where New Mexico (to work on MY business).
    It will be a huge change and I am so ready for it.
    I am going to write and create and I know I need space, quiet, peace and a starry sky to get the best out of me.
    I sometimes get nervous thinking about the cultural change but I just take a breath and remember that happiness is not out there – it’s right here nestled within me, regardless of where I journey to.
    Thank you again for everything, you inspire me all of the time.
    xo
    Molly

  84. If your word is calm, then I would have to say mine is “peace”. Finding peace inside, letting joy come out to play, backing off from”important things” to see the important things I’ve been missing. Loving and caring for myself, the critters, the world~things I never took the time to love and care for before. Learning to cook so I can impress myself and others with delish food loaded with love and pizazz =) and above all ENJOY the meandering path as I find my way. You planted awesome seeds with Crazy Sexy Diet and after a year of germinating I have morphed into a veggie/vegan power puff girl~stunning all I know with my amazing 180~thank you girl!! Can’t wait to get my hands on your new book! xoxoxoxo

  85. Thank you Kris, for all the uplifting articles and especially info on safe foods and safer makeup. Hope you can continue at a slower pace. Wishing you the best, happiest, new year.
    Barbara