Re-write Your Gospel

By Guest Blogger   |  17Comments|

I did something wonderful and adorably dorky tonight in the name of self-love.

I worked on my new gospel. For 30 minutes on my car ride home, I spoke out every damn thing that went right. I accounted for every person I could think of who I met at the exact right time, who taught me exactly what I needed to learn. I channeled Al Green and transformed my ballads into sweet love songs. That old friendship that broke my heart? It taught me to walk away. The boss I thought was a doofus? Inspired me to start my own business. The client who dumped me? She taught me not to be desperate. I added all the times I was surprised and elementally perfect rendezvous that I couldn’t have ever anticipated. Meeting my husband, a New York Jew just like me, in my living room in uh, Portland, Oregon?! Eating popsicles in Maui that were crafted by a woman who bestowed upon me the phrase “attitude of gratitude,” with her sidekick, Wolf. Finding my future, perfect business partner at a Yeshiva. Re-meeting my best friend from childhood through Facebook and starting up where we left off. A bus ride in Ghana that made me laugh without inhibition at the insanity of it all.

I remembered how often life has been on my side. Amen.

While I was at it, I added everything that is right, now. I’ve got a vibrant baby girl, a partner who’s got my back no matter what, work that revs me up, a healthy body, devoted parents, brilliant friends, an ongoing conversation with the cosmos. And I have a cute haircut and drank a great cup of coffee today. Preach it!

Just to round it out, I spoke out (rather quickly at this point, and sort of in tongues) all that is ahead, the unseen that will bring forth more glory. Not the same old, same old. The successes I’m anticipating. The excitement about moving to a new place and the friends who are waiting for me there. The places I haven’t yet seen.

If you have noticed your fears and are wondering what the heck to do next, give yourself a perspective makeover, and pinky-swear that you are going to get rid of the rest. Create a new story that highlights everything that worked, and vow to start forgetting the rest.

Look for things to appreciate right now, big and small: the banana muffin you ate today, the ten minutes to yourself, light traffic on your commute, Bob Marley, Gaga, kittens, bunnies, and balloons — whatever hits your happy button.

Get curious about what hasn’t happened yet. What are you excited for? What’s in the works? If you’re stuck, the phrases, “I’m looking forward to…” and “I’m anticipating” are surefire starters to hopeful thoughts. Follow up with Amens.

Each time those old fears start with their wah-wah’s and poor me’s, speak out your emerging litany. Literally. In your car, in the shower, on a walk. If you’re worried about looking crazy, put in your headphones and act like you’re talking to someone. However you do it, hearing these new thoughts out loud carves out new neuro-pathways that are fertile and luscious. By actively creating new thoughts, you are doing something about it.

Helaina Altabef is on a personal and professional hunt for clarity.

Photo credit: Corita Kent

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17 responses to Re-write Your Gospel
  1. “Attitude of Gratitude” what it’s all about.

  2. Love it! Amen!! Thank you!

  3. “The Client who dumped me? She taught me not to be desperate.” The lover who dumped me? The loan I was denied? The debt that I’m in? It all comes around to “not to be desperate”.

  4. I agree Michele. I used to rush into action in moments of desperation–no good at all. I’m really trying to activate my own pause button instead. Thanks for reading!

  5. Lov’n it. Every word in this article speaks to me. Well written Helaina! Makes me think if those juicy long conversations you, Michal and I use to have when we just simply had more time to have conversations! Preach it sista!
    Much love,

  6. Yes, ma’am! Your positivity is positively infectious and it rolls off you in waves. Love ya miss ya.

  7. WOW! Did you write that as fast as I read it? I couldn’t wait to get to the next word, phrase, next thought! Wonderful! Tomorrow’s my birthday, my new year’s day. A day for reassessment. What a great inspiration for a new beginning! Blessings!

  8. You are a ray of sunshine!!!!

  9. Feeling really blessed and so fortunate to have read this post today. Thanks for reminding me of all the lessons that others and experiences have taught me. Definitely making this my new oral repertoire tradition. Yes!

  10. Love, love, love this! Beautifully written!

  11. Awesome!

  12. Preach it! — more “preaching” of the positives in our life, please!

  13. Thank you for the wonderful words and spirit in them! This week I literally walked away from my old story…with a move of faith back to the place I love most in the world…so I alternate between huge bursts of faith, and little nuggets of doubt…living my new story before I had a chance to write it :)

  14. Why Buddha?

  15. Awesome!

  16. Wow! I needed that! Hope is a powerful thing!
    Many blessings!

  17. Thank you for sharing! This has lightened me up. I cannot wait to do this! <3